Dance The Night Away: Mister Electric Blue

This is a different kind of story. It's more Paul's story than mine. I'm with him doing the paranormal investigation, and I suppose parenting. But I wouldn't be there if it weren't for him, Paul and his dance class, supporting his little friends. 

"Can we go look for ghosts?"
I looked up at the kids. Paul and some of his little dance friends were standing there, during the fundraising Bingo game on the third floor of the Piper Museum. Lilly, Kendra, Tall Addie, Short Addie, Georgie, all wanting me to go and distract them.

Well, hell. It's better than Bingo.

"Let me bring my stuff," I said. I grabbed my small travel bag from my backpack and hung it over my shoulder. "Come on, let's go check out the west side of the building."
We walked across the hall and into the big meeting room. Lilly said,"What if we get caught in here?"

"Just play innocent. They can't be too uptight about it; they didn't even lock the door. Who wants to hold the EMF detector?"

Several hands went up. I handed it to Short Addie and said,"Everyone take turns."

They began taking readings with the detector. Kendra said,"Hey! There's candy on this desk over here!"

"Can we steal some?" asked Tall Addie.

"I should be a good example, but there's peanut butter cups. One each."

We ate someone else's candy. I said,"Wait until the competitions, guys. We're gonna be in Scranton, Lancaster, and Utica, and I've already got some of the good ghost stories researched out. In fact, the theater we'll be in up in Utica is said to be haunted."

"Can we help investigate?" asked Lilly.

"Of course you can," I said. "I'll bring extra equipment."

I watched the numbers tick down on my GPS, and said,"Coming up on the overpass, kiddo. That's the one just outside of Scranton where the Suscon Screamer is said to haunt. Oh, and there are Squonk sightings, too, so keep your eyes open."

"Bet that," said Paul, in the back of the jeep.

I'd bought the GPS from Chris, and programmed in the coordinates for the overpass. As we approached, I got out my camera and turned on the EMF detector. It showed nothing as we passed under the overpass, and I didn't see anything worth noting.

Michelle glanced over from the driver's seat. "How's it going?"

"Well, that was anticlimactic. Of course, the Suscon Screamer may just be an urban legend anyway. There's still stuff to check out in Scranton. There's a UFO sighting near there, a UFO that was said to have crashed in Carbondale back in 1974. It landed in a pond, and people said they saw a green light for days afterward."

"How much longer until Scranton?" asked Paul.

"About ten minutes or so. We're almost there now, buddy. Did you know that Scranton had the first electric cable cars? That's why it's called the Electric City."
"Nope, didn't know that," said Paul, texting someone.

"So you guys will be dancing Mister Electric Blue in the Electric City."

"Cool. Can we stop at Dave's Hot Chicken?"

"Are you really a paranormal investigator?" asked the guy at the hotel desk.

I'd forgotten I was wearing the shirt that said that. "Funny you should ask. I really am."

"What's the scariest thing you've ever encountered?"

"That'd be my sister-in-law. You aware of any interesting ghost stories or old legends around here?"

He thought it over. "Not really. My stepsister thinks her dad is still haunting her."

I usually ask around a little, and try to talk to some locals. Sometimes it pays off, and sometimes it doesn't. This was looking like it was going to be that second one.

"Bigfoot, UFO sightings?"

"No, but we have a woman who works breakfast in the morning. She might know something."
"Okay, thanks." I carried the luggage up to the room.

Paul was practicing one of the dance routines in the bedroom. I said,"You make sure you get sleep tonight, little man. You're not on until Sunday, but we can go tomorrow and you can support your friends, if you like."

"Yeah," he said. "I want to."

I was standing at the breakfast counter, getting some more coffee. The woman working asked me,"Are you really a paranormal investigator?"

I was still wearing the same shirt from the night before. I said,"I am. Are you familiar with any interesting haunted places around here?"

"No, not really," she said. "I'm a spiritualist, but I don't know of anything too close."

Some days it be like that. I said,"Do you know of the Carbondale sighting? A UFO crashed into a pond in 1974?"

"No, I've never heard of that one. I'd believe it, though."

I walked outside and strolled around the hotel property. I walked past the Triple-A office next door, making a note to come back when it was open and check for maps. I walked down the hill to the Sam's Club parking lot, and checked around with the EMF detector. Nothing. The strip of forest land between the hotel and the highway was covered with litter, and therefore not likely to be any sort of a harbor for the local Bigfoot sightings. Scranton, so far, was turning out to be a bust, paranormal-wise.

I looked up the hill at the hotel, through the strip of trees. If I hiked up the hill, I could use it as a shortcut to get back. I walked up, and found a stone wall with a fence atop it blocking my way.

I stopped and calculated a bit. I could climb the wall easily enough. Then maybe I could make my way along the fence until it ended, and be back on hotel lawn in a moment. I grabbed a handhold and began climbing.

There were plenty of handholds, and I got to the top and found myself standing on a very thin strip of grass on top of a ten-foot drop. With branches and obstacles in the way. It occurred to me how easily this could go wrong, and how badly hurt I could be if it did.

I grabbed the fence and braced myself, and began carefully working my way along the top of the wall. I wouldn't have thought twice about all this when I was sixteen. Of course, I got injured a lot more often back then.

In a few minutes, I'd made it to the edge of the fence, and with some relief I stepped onto the safe grass. Already risked a serious injury once today, and it was just now ten AM.

I made my way back to the Triple-A office. They wound up light on local maps, though apparently if I wanted one of Ontario I could have my pick. I did find an interesting catalogue about Lackawanna County, and took that. I walked back to the hotel, sat down in the lobby area, and began paging through.

Now, this was worth it. Pages on Bigfoot and Squonks, haunted spots, UFOs. There was a full page on the Carbondale sighting. And I found a photo that looked awfully familiar.

I got out my cell phone and called my friend Dani. Dani is a performer who does acrobatics and stilts; I'd known her for thirteen years.

"Dani, it's Lou."

"Hey! How are you doing? How's your family?"

"We're all good! Paul is in a dance competition in Scranton. Butters is doing good; he needs a haircut." We'd gotten our dog from Dani. "Dani, have you ever performed up in Lackawanna County?"

"Quite a bit!"

"I think your photo appears in a local catalogue up here. You're wearing a fedora with feathers, holding up two hoops, and standing about four feet taller than everyone else."

"That would be me, alright."

"I'll send you a copy."
"Thanks! I keep a scrapbook."

Over the years I've met some interesting people.

I went back to the hotel and sat down on the stairs, taking a moment to text Chloe and let her know how thing were going. I barely text, but Chloe is one of my few exceptions. I'd gotten used to having her as my lifeline when I was away, and she was reporting back to the rest of the team.

I took the catalogue back to the hotel room. Paul was on the bed, watching his cell phone. He looked up at me. "Can we have Dave's Hot Chicken for lunch?"

"Maybe," I said,"Hey, little man, check this out."

I showed him the picture of the Squonk. He said,"Awwww."

We walked up to the Scranton High School together, the whole family. Until Paul saw the first friend of the afternoon, said."I'm good now, Dad," and peeled off.

"Well, we used to have a kid," I commented.

Michelle and I walked through the door, and there was a line going through security. They were scanning people with metal detectors. I swear, it's easier to get into the goddamned Pentagon than your average school. The security guard stopped me and said,"Do you have anything in your pockets, sir?"

I sighed. "I have a pocketknife."

"You can't bring that in here," he said. "You'll have to leave that in your car."

I held my hand out to Michelle. "Gimmie the keys. I'll meet you."

I walked back out to the car, dropped off my knife, and started walking back. Jason, the studio owner's husband, caught me and said,"Lou! If I bring the truck around, can you help me unload that window for the act and wheel it in?"

"Oh, sure, absolutely. I'll wait here for you."

Five minutes later, he was back with his big panel truck and we unloaded one of the set pieces. It was a big window on wheels; I'd helped paint it. I wheeled it into the door, where I encountered the same security guard.

"You didn't have that before," he commented.

"I figured," I said,"If I have anything else I shouldn't, I'll just throw it out the window."

To give him credit, he laughed pretty hard at that.

I rolled the window across the floor and turned it over to Miss Nikki, one of the teachers. I walked around the lobby for a while, and spotted Paul with a whole gaggle of his little teammates, gathered in their costumes.

Miss Rachel, the studio owner, joined me. "I'm glad you guys made it," she said. "The girls didn't want to get ready without Paul. They demanded to come out here and wait for him."

I smiled. "I love what a cohesive team they are. I have my team, and Paul has his. It's always nice to see what a great group they make."

With Paul secured and everything done for the moment, I walked around the lobby a while more. I wound up back near the door, and nodded at the security guard.

"You really a paranormal investigator?" he asked.

"I'm getting a lot of that this weekend," I said. "I really am. Lock Haven Paranormal Seekers, out in Clinton County."
"That's really cool, man. Have any good stories?"

"We just recently had a pretty active investigation at an abandoned funeral home."

"Cool."

"Been looking into the UFO crash landing in Carbondale. You happen to know anything about that?"

"Oh, sure, I worked the festival once," he said. "They have a big thing up there. There's one guy who says he caused it all, though---Threw a lantern into the pond as a teenager, and then just never said anything when everyone thought it was a UFO."
"I'd heard that," I said.

"I actually talked to the guy," he told me. "He sounded pretty convincing."

I knew how that went. I'd spoken to some people who have given me the real story on paranormal events over the years. I'd also seen how something simple, like a lantern thrown into a pond, could fly completely off the rails and become a huge legend.

"I suppose I can cross that one off my list," I said. "Every once in a while, I find something like that. I had a field day with Raystown Ray a couple of years ago."

I circulated some more, watching the kids. They were sitting by one wall, and they'd get up and practice for a while, three or four of them. They'd take some photos, and laugh together, and it wasn't the first time I'd thought of it....What an amazing team they'd all become. I had Jay, Lex, Chloe, and Ashlin. Paul had Team Edge and all the other dancers.

"He was a stranger....He walked in looking for danger...."

I stood backstage, watching Paul and his team dance. Mister Electric Blue. I was always amazed at how professional they looked, in their costumes, doing their thing on stage.

"And I said, oooh! Mister Electric Blue....I believe in you....."

I ended up in the audience, with Michelle, as they brought all the kids out to sit on the stage for the awards. The announcer came out and said,"Okay, before we start, we're going to need a couple of volunteers. We need some of the dads to come up here. We're going to have a dad dance-off."

The girls all called out. From the stage, Paul glanced at me.

I stood up.

"We have our first volunteer! Come on up! What dance studio do you represent?"

"Rachel's Dance Unlimited," I said.

Three other dads joined me on the stage. The music began to play. I haven't danced since I was seventeen. I wasn't all that good at it then, and being middle-aged hasn't helped that any. But I did a little of what I remembered, and incorporated a high kick, which I knew from karate.

The kids all cheered. Paul's friends were delighted. One of the other dads won the contest, but they gave me a pair of sunglasses for my kid.

I handed them to Paul. He grinned.

"You came in second, Dad!" he said. "Can we get Dave's Hot Chicken?"

Return To Fort Reed (2006-2026)

 Every now and again, Tif and I tried to have breakfast together, as if we were a normal family. I sat at the table and sipped my coffee.

"This month is twenty years since I started in local history," I commented.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was hired at the museum in March of 2006. They hired me based on my research into the Tiadaghton Declaration of Independence....I never really did wrap that up."

"Oh, god, Dad, you're not going to get into that again, are you?"

"Well, it's still out there."

"Every time. Every time this comes up, you start all over again. And out come the maps and the newspaper articles...."

"I might reopen this one. It's my anniversary. And the document is still out there."

"How do you figure you're going to get all the way to McElhattan?"

I smiled.

"I have partners."

"Are you guys familiar with the Tiadaghton Declaration of Independence?" I asked from the back of the car.

"Not yet," commented Jay.

It was raining. We were riding around in Jay's car---Jay and Lex up front, me in the back. We did this some nights, ride around and explore. Like that scene from Wayne's World, except with ghosts.

"The Declaration of Independence in Philadelphia is not the only one," I explained. "There were seven others signed within a two-year period, all in Pennsylvania. One of them was right here in Clinton County. On the same day, July fourth, 1776, a group called the Fair Play Men at Fort Horn met and signed this document. They took it to be sent to King George, but in a very Monty Python moment, they were told that one had already been sent. So they brought it back and buried it somewhere on or near the grounds of the fort."

"No kidding," commented Lex.

"It was buried in a metal box. It's never been found. The military brought a mine detector in 1949, and never did find the thing. Way back when I was first hired in local history, I was researching this. My theory....I think one of the signers had it buried with him. And I think we're heading to it."

"Which way?" asked Jay.

"Turn left."

She pulled down the snaky S-turn of Spook Hollow Road. I said,"The fort was up at this bend---There's a monument to it. I'll show you."

She pulled off at the bend, and we got out of the car. Lightning flashed in the sky. Jay said nervously,"Is it okay with our equipment out here?"

"You mean, will it hurt the equipment?"

"I mean, will we get hit with lightning?"

"Should be okay," said Lex.

"Yeah, it's not likely we get struck," I agreed. "We're not at any more risk here than we would be anyplace else."

We walked down the path, and the monument was there, just like I remembered it. Fort Horn. 1776.

"Here it is," I said. "This is where they signed a declaration of independence, almost two and half centuries ago."

"See, I'm just saying," I explained,"Your lease doesn't specifically state you can't have a pet Squonk."

"This is true," admitted Lex.

We sat in the parking area in Wayne Township, by the Susquehanna River. It was still pouring out, and we'd decided to wait a while until the rain slowed down a bit. 

"Twenty years ago, I was researching the Tiadaghton Declaration," I said. "I walked into the local historical society with a theory that one of the Fair Play Men had it buried with him. On the strength of that theory, they hired me as a curator. I didn't know just how much this was going to escalate into a career."

Jay grinned. "It really did, didn't it? Everyone who needs to know about Lock Haven comes to you."

"You did."

"I'm glad I did."

"Me too. Now, over the years I've learned a lot more about all this, but the document is still out there. It was said to be buried somewhere on the fort, but I've always thought it was possible that they later dug it up, and the last one had it buried with him. And that would be Robert Love, who is in Quiggle Cemetery just up the hill. Now, me actually digging it up would be the tiniest bit illegal, but it's enough for me to know it's there."

"How did you find the grave?" asked Jay.

"You can find any grave in the county with the genealogical society records. Speaking of, you guys still want to come to the genealogical society meeting on Tuesday?"

"I want to, but I have to work," said Jay.

"I'll be there," said Lex.

"It's in a haunted church, if that helps."

"So how do you find out if the metal box is buried there?" Jay asked.

"In all this time, I've never taken my metal detector and checked," I said. "It's been a possibility, but there's always other ghosts and mysteries getting in the way. You know how it goes. So that would be one method worth trying."

She grinned. "So that's why you brought the metal detector along tonight."

"That's why." I glanced out the window. "Looks like the rain's easing up. Want to do this?"

"Yes," said Jay. "Let's."

We got out of the car and started walking up the hill. The rain almost immediately started up again, but I figured we're paranormal investigators. Adventurers. We're tough; we can take a little rain.

"This is going to ruin my hair," said Jay.

"It's harder to look badass when you say stuff like that," I said.

We walked up and over the railroad tracks. We walked up the path, and there was Quiggle Cemetery.

"Robert Love," I said. "We want Robert Love."
The grave was one of the first rows when we got into the cemetery. I found the marker in about ten seconds. I turned on the metal detector and lowered it to the ground.

"The document was  buried in a metal box," I said. "Now, let's see if there's metal down----"

Beeep.

Lex and Jay lit up. I moved the detector around a bit more, getting a very consistent signal at the foot of the grave. I grinned at them.

"Looks like there's something," I said. "We'll have to look into this more this summer, during the 250th anniversary."

"Is there any way to get the actual shape of the thing underground?"

"Well, ground-penetrating radar. But I'll never be able to afford that. The cheapest ones start at fourteen thousand or so. I'll have to stick with my ninety-dollar detector."

"This is amazing," said Jay.

"You want to get back to the car?"

"Yeah."

I was waiting outside the haunted church when Lex arrived, walking down Water Street. I said,"Thanks for coming. You want to do a little trespassing before the meeting?"

"Of course I do."

I was glad to have some time with Lex. Out of all my teammates, she was the one that I'd so far spent the least one-on-one time with. I hung out with Ashlin and Chloe all the time, and I'd done some exploring with Jay. So it was nice to have some time with Lex, just the two of us.

She followed me across the alley to the museum---The same museum I used to work at. I opened the gate and said,"I haven't set foot on this property since 2012."

She followed me in, and we walked back to the pavilion that covered an archaeological dig. And it all came back to me.

"Wow," I said. "They've really let this place go to hell. These people don't know what the hell they're doing. They once hired a curator who unleashed a curse on the whole building."

"I'm going to go out on a limb here, and guess that was you," she said.

"The specifics aren't important."

Lex leaned over the fence. "Cool," she said.

The pavilion protected a stone foundation that was in a rectangular pit. The foundation was a couple of feet underneath where ground level would have been. One side of the pit was collapsing, and the fence around the whole thing was falling apart.

"We found this during a day camp dig in the summer of 2006," I said. "I did the research, and we figured out it may have been the foundation to Fort Reed. That was connected with Fort Horn; they were both along the Susquehanna Line, and some of the same people were at both. We did a whole dig, and found a lot of stuff. I remember going through a lot of the old documents and reporting to my boss every day."

2006: In Anne's office, I explained my findings to her. She'd been in the phone, threatening to send me down to Northumberland County to check land grants.

"So I went into the Grafius Building---Yes, I trespassed, you can bitch me out for it later---And found that it was built in 1843. It's pretty safe to say William Reed didn't built it, as he died in 1808."

"Wait....You entered the Grafius House?"

"It's all offices now. I went in the front hall. I'm part Irish. Nobody told me to go away; that's what we consider an invitation."

"What else have you found?"

"The DAR put the monument up in 1899. They have the date wrong; they claim it's 1775 when it was actually 1777. I'd like to look into that, and find out what their thought process was when they established that. I want to see what documentation they had."

"Okay," said Anne. "Because if we can document this as Fort Reed, the Channel Sixteen guy said he'd come back with a news crew and give us a story."

"You mind if I leave early?....I want to run to the library, and see what I can dig up there."

"Go."

I walked with Lex around the other side of the dig. I was somewhat cheered to see that the sign we'd designed was still in place, showing the process of the dig.

"What if you went further?" asked Lex. "Keep digging along the foundation going that way?"

"We decided  not to do that," I said. "We could only go just so far. Besides, that's an actual outhouse. When they built it, they would have cut through the foundation on that side."
"Wow. An outhouse from the old days?"

"I climbed down the pit on a ladder once."

"Why would you---"

"Wanted to see how far it went down, and if I could find signs of the foundation from that side. We spent a whole summer working on this dig. Found a lot of artifacts. One of them was a lid to a teapot belonging to Jennie Reed."

"Jennie Reed lived here....?"

"Jennie Reed was the closest thing Clinton County ever had to a Disney Princess. She was about Chloe's age when her father built Fort Reed, and she lived on the frontier. She negotiated with the Native Americans and gave them milk and butter. When the Great Runaway happened in 1778, and everyone left the valley to avoid an attack, she buried her clay teapot and dug it up later. We found a lid that we could identify as probably hers."
"That's so cool."

"Now that I think about it...."

Lex watched me expectantly, "Yes?"
"The Tiadaghton Declaration. I always had a little trouble working out the timeline on this one. They signed it and took it to Philadelphia, but then brought it back. It's pretty well documented that it was buried, but the question would have been when they dug it back up. It never made any sense to bury it and then just dig it up again. But if they did it during the Great Runaway....."

"It makes sense, doesn't it?"

"It does. They buried it when they returned to Fort Horn, but dug it up either just before or just after the Great Runaway. And then one of them, probably Robert Love, had it buried with him. Where we may have found it the other night."

Lex grinned. "I can't believe all this is within walking distance of my place. I never knew any of this until I met you."

"I've always said that this stuff is in every community. But the thing Lock Haven has that other places don't is me, discovering and promoting this stuff." I looked at my watch. "Ready for the meeting?"

"I love this city," Lex said as I walked her home.

"I always have," I agreed. I looked out at the street lights along Main Street. "I give tours, I write about it....This is my place. I belong here."

"And you've been at it twenty years now."

"Twenty years since I started in local history. I got hired at the museum in 2006, joined LHPS when it was created in 2007, started writing for the newspapers in 2008. I was already researching the forts when I got hired; they hired me based on my research. Back in the beginning, I was also working on the Underground Railroad, the ghost in my house, and the Colebrook Cairns."

"I assume we'll be getting to all these adventures sometime."

"We will. There's always more adventures out there."

We stopped in front of her place. Lex said,"Thanks for giving me something to do while Jay was out. I'll be back for the next meeting."
I smiled.

"Thanks for coming, Lex. Have a nice night."

Guess What's Coming To Dinner?

I walked into the small bistro and looked around. The girl at the counter said,"Welcome to Jumangi Bistro. Can I help you?"

"I was wondering if the owner might have a moment," I said.

She called into the back room. "Can you talk? It's the guy from historical---"

"Oh, yes! Send him back!"

I walked back into the little office to find a pleasant-looking woman sitting there. I said,"I got your message this morning, and since I was in the neighborhood, I thought I'd touch base."

"Thank you for coming! I don't want you thinking I'm crazy...."

"I hear a lot of that. Don't worry."

"We've had some things happen here, and I'd like you to check it out. I've seen some ghosts, and a woman saw a little girl. She won't eat here anymore."

"I'll be happy to talk to my team and schedule an investigation. We can keep it as confidential as you'd like...."

"Oh, I don't mind. Will you be writing about it? It could be good for business."

"I've known that to happen. I will say, a few years ago I investigated the apartment building across the street, and the parking lot over there has really high electromagnetic fields. It can make a hunted place seem worse, and make people really anxious in a non-haunted place. Right now, with the streetlights coming on around four-thirty, that could be having an effect."

"Oh, that's interesting. I've had some things happen at my house, too. Will you come and check that out?"

I smiled. "Sure. I'll talk to the team."

"Name a time."
"We usually do Saturdays."

"This coming Saturday is Valentine's Day."

"No, not this one. I was thinking the next one. Seven PM?"

"We'll still have customers in here. Is that okay?"
"We'll work around them. Could be good for business."

"I agree. Can I advertise it?"
"Don't see why not."

On my way out, a man at a table called over. "Hey! We had the house out on Great Island. Remember that one?"

"Oh, it's been a few years! I remember investigating that one. How have you been?"

I can't go anywhere.

"Babe, can you set the spirit box to seven point seven?" Jay called from the kitchen. "I'm grating the cheese."

I love being able to hear things like that.

I was at Lex and Jay's place. We'd decided to get together and have some time before the investigation. I'd gotten bored and come down a couple of hours early, and I'd been around long enough now that a couple of their seventeen or so cats were taking turns on my lap.

"Chloe can't make it tonight," I said,"But Ashlin will be here after work. We'll head over to the restaurant in time to investigate. I've been advertising it to the public; I get people all the time asking about coming on an investigation. If we don't get a crowd, I'm gonna be pissed."

"Well, we have people who are going to be there," said Lex. 

"I'm hoping we can bring some business in for them."

"I think it'll be busy," said Jay. "Can you have salt?"

"Oh, sure."

"Are you sure? Your blood pressure...."

"I'm on medication; I'm allright. I only died a little, and I got better."

"What do we know about the history of the place?" Jay asked me.

"The property used to be the Keller Hotel. It was built in 1863. By the early 1900s, it had changed to the Russell Hotel and was run by Frank Bowes. He died in the 1930s at age fifty-three, so he's a candidate to be haunting the place. Of course, with a hotel, you can't always tell who may have checked in and died there---Unless I stumble on anything in the newspapers, there's no record of that."

"Yeah, that makes sense," said Lex.

"So we'll go down tonight, and see what we get."

"I love these ones we can walk to,"Lex said as we headed down Main Street. "Together in our uniforms. I feel so badass."

I grinned. "There's the ice cream," I said.

We walked across the street. In the middle of the sidewalk was an embedded marble shape that resembled a block of ice cream, with chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. Lex grinned. "Oh, yeah, I see it."

"This was an ice cream place once. The owner loved it so much he put this here as a little monument." 

We walked down and around the corner, to the restaurant. Through the front windows, I could see a crowd inside. I smiled.

"Let's go in."

"Okay, guys, get photos, get some EMF readings, get a baseline," I said. "Photos from every angle. Let's document this."

I turned to the assembled crowd. "Ladies and gentlemen, thanks for coming tonight. We're the Lock Haven Paranormal Seekers, and we're here or do an investigation. To those of you who expected us tonight, thanks for coming, and to the rest of you, we apologize for interrupting your dinner. Please feel free to ask questions and talk to any of our team."

"What's that you're using?" one guy asked me.

"This is an EMF detector. It measures electricity and magnetism. Now, you have to be careful you're not getting something from cables or outlets or something, but this can be a sign that something paranormal may be going on."

Jay was setting her bell up behind me, and she had her spirit box out. The guy asked,"What's that thing?"
"Jay? You wanna explain?"

Jay stepped forward. "This....well....It's a spirit box. It gets sounds and radio waves, and sometimes picks up on voices."

"Are you a member of the team?" someone asked Ashlin.

"Yeah, I'm just real quiet."

"I want to check out EMFs in the parking lot across the street," I said. "A few years ago, we had an investigation over there, and it turned out there were really outrageously high EMFs when the streetlights came on. That seemed to be affecting the family there. I want to see how far the EMFs reach. Who wants to come along?"

"I could step outside," said Ashlin.

"I'll go along," said Jay.

"Lex, you hold the fort here," I said.

"But I'm a menace."

"I have every faith in you."

We walked outside. As we crossed Grove Street, Jay said,"I see you trying to push me out of my comfort zone there."

"Well, I wasn't sure that was out of your comfort zone. But you did fine. We do public appearances sometimes, but I do most of the talking. I think Ashlin's said like three words at these things."
Ashlin grinned. "That's about right."

The parking lot was lit up, and the second we approached, our EMF detectors spiked high. MOne began beeping urgently. Jay said,"Whoa."
"Yeah, see what I mean? This has to be affecting the people who live in that building. If they can reach across the street, it might affect Jumangi, too."

We walked back. The levels dropped as we went back across. I said,"Okay, let's get back inside and provide the night's entertainment."

The bell went off again, Uner Jay's supervision, it had been somewhat acrive all night. Jay was at a nearby table, talking with a couple of the customers. Ashlin was on one side of the room, taking EMF readings, and I saw Lex kneeling by a table, talking to a little girl and her mom. I was circulating the room, taking readings and photos and pausing to answer questions from the customers. 

It was past eight PM; that had snuck up on me a bit. It had been an active night---We'd gotten fluctuations in temperature, EMF readings, and audio. 

"Somebody message Chloe," I said. "See how she's doing, and let her know how things are going. Tell her I miss her."

"We got you," said Jay.

"Have you ever faced anything....Well....Malevolent?" a man asked me.

"Well, kind of," I said. "We've checked out the old jail, which has criminals, and there's no reason to think death has made them any nicer. But what I get asked a lot is things like demons, but my stock answer there is that we're not, scientifically, there yet. You can't classify things until you can prove they exist, and we haven't yet done that with ghosts."

Jay came up behind me. "JJ is outside. Want to talk to her?"

"Yeah, I probably should check in."
We walked outside together. The owner was sitting in the passenger seat of her car, taking a smoke break. I said,"How's it going?"

"It's been crazy, but that's a good thing. Thanks for coming tonight. How's it going with you?"

"Good investigation. I'm prepared to classify your place as a Class Three haunted location."

"Will you be posting the results on social media?"

"With your permission."

"Oh, yes. Go ahead. I'd like to have you come to my home, too."

"I'll be in touch to arrange that. We'd be glad to."

"I got a call from my uncle tonight. He saw you through the window and asked if I needed help. He's a lawyer. He thought you were ICE and waving a gun around."

I cringed a little. "Jesus. That was my laser thermometer. I even changed my outfit so I wouldn't look so much Ike an ICE agent. Sorry about that." Gonna have to consult a bit with Chloe on some more uniform changes.

"It's okay. I told him we had ghost hunters in the building."

"Well, it's been a good investigation. We're glad to be here."
"Would you be willing to do something like this again?"
"Sure we would."

When I got back inside, I saw the little girl with her mom at the table. I knelt down and said,"Having a good time?"

She nodded. "Yeah!"

"Good. I'm glad. How old are you?"
"I'm eight."

"Oh, yeah? You go to Robb Elementary?"
"No, I'm home schooled."

"Oh, okay. Cool." I pulled the ghost patch off my bandolier and handed it to her. "Well, take this. I now declare you to be an official ghost hunter. Put that on something."
She smiled and put it in her pocket. I said to the mom,"Thanks for coming tonight."

It was dark and cold when we left. Carrying our equipment, we headed back over toward Jay and Lex's place. As we walked, Jay said,"That was great."
"It was a good night," I agreed. "I'm going to have trouble getting to sleep for a while."
"Me too. I'm not even going to try."

Lex grinned as we walked down Main Street. "You know, I can't think of anyone else I'd rather do this with."

Hey There Delilah

Jaydann and I trudged out of Linnwood Cemetery in the dark. 

"Well, that was interesting," she said.

I nodded. "A whole lot of activity. I thought checking out the grave of a murder victim would be a good idea."

"That really worked. A lot of EMFs."
"We'll have to come back sometime when it's not nineteen degrees out."

"So he was a murder victim?"

"He was killed with a spike maul in 1903. That's a sort of railroad hammer."

"Nice career you got."

We got in the car, and she started driving. It had been her idea to invite me out to do a little investigating on a Friday night, just for no reason. She and I had been talking a lot lately, and becoming friends; Jaydann and Alexis had rapidly been turning into "Jay" and "Lex" in my life.

She said,"I'll drop  by our next client and do the intake interview tomorrow."
"That sounds good. I've been predicting it's going to be busier lately---With the country in a time of crisis, and the two hundred and fiftieth anniversary of the country coming up, I'm thinking we may have an upswing in activity. And it seems to be beginning."
"Really?"

"Yeah, we have two investigations this month, and two more possibles next month. Normally we have three or four investigations per year."

"Oh my god."

"I didn't mean to kind of throw you new people into it like this, bringing you on board at a crazy time. It just seems to have worked out that way."
She grinned.

"We don't mind."

"So, I mean, the Flash didn't even get his own movie really. He wound up being an extra in Superman's movie, starring Batman."

I was sitting at the doughnut shop with Chloe before the investigation. We were having our monthly coffee and chatting, the way we did. I glanced out the window and grinned.

"Well, look who it is."

Lex and Jay came in. Chloe said,"Oh, hi, guys! What're you doing here?"

"Ashlin's not feeling well," said Lex. "We figured we'd come over and pick you two up. We don't want to make you walk."

"Well, appreciate that," I said. "Let's grab our stuff and get going. We've got a home on Main Street to check out tonight."

The family was gathered in the kitchen when we came in. Natasha and her daughter Ashlynn were there; they'd been there last time. I was a little surprised to see relatives Erin and her little daughter Allie there, too---I'd done a tour for them a couple of years ago. I adore Allie; she's a few years younger than Paul.

"Hi, guys," I said. "Didn't expect to see you here!"

"We were interested," said Erin.

"Is Paul here?" asked Allie.

"No, honey, he went out shopping," I said. "If I'd known you were going to be here, I'd have made sure he came. Jay, here's the intake form. You can run down the checklist."

Jay took the form and started questioning Natasha. Jay, to my relief, had offered to take over some of the paperwork end of the team. I pulled on my hood and my fingerless gloves, then the shoulder bag over my uniform. 

"Do you have any hot spots in the house? Anywhere the activity happens a lot?"

"Upstairs in the bedrooms," said Natasha.

"We'll start up there," I said.

"Are we going to see Delilah?" asked Allie.

"Well, maybe," I said. "Last time, I discovered that Delilah Masters is probably haunting the house. We're coming again to look into that. We may get a little evidence tonight."
"Is it scary?"

"No, honey, it's not. I know TV makes it look scary, but really it's kind of calm and quiet."

The dog came in. The family has this big blind Boxer named Dozer. He made the rounds and sniffed all of us, and I got down on my knees and petted him.

"Hi, Dozer, how you been? Good boy. Good boy."

He licked my face. I laughed; I love when dogs do that. "I love when there's a dog," I said. "I forgot to bring some treats for him."

"Oh, he can't have them," said Ashlynn. "He's diabetic."

"Oh, that makes me feel better."

I stood up.

"Suit up, guys," I said. "Let's get started."

"Recording," I said. "Seventy-thirty on January twenty-four, main bedroom. Lou."

"Jaydann."
"Alexis."

"Chloe."

We always go around the room, and everyone says their names for the recording. It's procedure. We had two recorders out, mine and Lex's. My EMF detector and Jay's. Chloe had her camera. I had my laser thermometer. And we'd place the bell and the cat ball in the hallway, within view.

"Is there anyone here?" I asked.

"Are we going to see Delilah?" asked Allie, sitting on the bed.

"Maybe," I said. "You never know."

"EMF up to yellow," said Jay.

"Getting activity," I said. "I'm going to thermometer." I got out my laser thermometer and aimed it out into the hallway.

Chloe giggled. "He holds that thing like a gun."

"It's been mistaken for one," I admitted. "There's a reason I keep it tucked away in my bag, out of sight. Natasha, is there anything that could be putting off heat out there? I'm showing eighty degrees, and that doesn't sound right."

Natasha shook her head. "Nothing should be that hot."

"We're getting more activity this time than we did last time. Ashlynn, is there any reason we can't try your room? I remember we did last time."

Ashlynn nodded. "That's okay. We just have to leave the door closed so that cats don't escape."

"That's fine. Let's grab our stuff and transfer over."

One of the cats was in his cage, because, we were told, he'd bite. The other one, Lucifer, was at large. I petted him, which he tolerated for a moment, and then hissed at me.

"He doesn't get to meet too many men," said Ashlynn.

Lex immediately began to play with Lucifer, which he liked better. I set down my EMF detector and turned on the recorder.

"There's a set of servants stairs going into the other bedroom," commented Natasha. "Is it possible that we're being haunted by a servant?"

"It definitely is," I said. "I trace who lived in the house, but nobody keeps records of their servants. It's why psychics bring them up a lot, because you can't prove it either way. So, yeah, it may very well be that there's a servant haunting the place, and I didn't find a record of it."

"EMF to red!" Jay noted excitedly. "We may be getting a response when you bring up the servants. That could be it."

"It makes sense," I said. I got out the laser thermometer. I aimed it at the floor, and Lucifer jumped on the laser and tried to catch it for a moment until he realized who was holding it. He looked at me disdainfully and went back to Lex.

I looked around the room at the team. They all seemed to be developing theit own go-to outfits, the way I dd---Jay had her black backpack with the ghosts on it, and Lex was wearing her purple hoodie. Chloe had her LHPS shirt, just like mine, under a black jacket, and her camera hanging around her neck. I noticed she'd taken to wearing a black bandanna around one ankle, just like me. She was beginning to look like a smaller, younger version of myself.

"Are you a servant?" asked Jay. "Did you work here?"

The detector spiked to red again. I said,"That would explain a lot, actually. It's nearly impossible to track servants who lived here; they tended to be kept out of sight. So I'd never have found a record of them. A servant....That's a pretty good possibility."

In the end, we carried our equipment back out to Jay's car. It had gotten colder; a snowstorm was on the way. We climbed in, and Jay started for Mill Hall to drop off Chloe. I didn't particularly mind riding along; I was a bit happier knowing Chloe had gotten home safely.

"A lot more activity than last time," I commented. "That was a pretty good night."

"Different people," said Jay. "We brought different energy to it this time around."

"You guys did great," I said. "Proud of you."

Lex laughed. "You are like the ulrtimate dad figure. We were all talking about it earlier. You are the perfect bonus dad."

"Some of us need that," said Chloe.

"I lost my dad," said Jay. "So I'm really lucky that I found you."

"We're your daughters now," said Chloe. "You don't get a  choice,"

I looked at the team, riding in the dark car, and I smiled.

"I just have to say it," I said. "I love you guys."

Scars (1986-2026)

It had been a while since I'd been together with my whole family. But they were all gathered at my grandmother's house in Phoenixville, a whole crowd of them, even people I didn't really know.

I walked outside, onto the back steps. I looked around---It was night, and should have been darker than this. But I could see everything clearly; it was almost like daylight.

Then I looked up.

The moon was out. And then I saw it---Another moon. There were two. No---Four. I could see four moons rising in the sky.

What the hell?

Definitely something to be investigated. I went inside to find my outfit, but my pack wasn't anywhere. I started looking around, then asked one of my cousins. She hadn't seen it.

I went back outside. The four moons were still there. I needed to find my equipment, so I could figure out what was going on.

Then I opened my eyes. I rolled over in bed; it was almost seven. The sun was out; it was tomorrow.

"The world is a terrible place," said Paul.

"All I said was you had to get ready for school," I said.

He walked past me in the hallway and into his room, and I followed. "No, it's terrible, Dad," he said,

I said down on his bench. I wasn't sure I'd yet had enough coffee for this conversation. "Parts of it," I admitted. "How so?"

"I just saw a video online about a mother who drowned her daughter," he said. "They had her son in court about it."

"That is sad," I said. "But it's important to remember that the world is full of good people, too. The main thing is to make sure you're one of the good ones, trying to help and make things better. It's a good world worth working on. I'll always believe that."

He nodded. "Thanks, Dad."
"Seven-thirty, buddy. Get yourself ready for school."

I was putting away the Christmas decorations when I discovered the trap door. This wasn't a completely unusual experience for me; I'd had things like it happen before. Taking decorations out of the front window, I looked up, and there it was, a trap door in the ceiling.

"Anybody realize there's a trap door up here?" I asked.

Kelli looked up from her desk. "I've noticed that before," she said. "Some kind of crawlspace, I think."

"Never noticed that before. It's one of the few crevices in the Hecht Building I haven't explored yet," I commented. "I'll have to check it out when I get the chance."

I took the boxes of decorations down to the basement, and spotted a stepladder propped in one alcove. I carried it upstairs.

"Screw it. I'm going up there now."

I climbed up the ladder and pushed open the trapdoor, looking in with a flashlight.

"Find any dead bodies?" asked Sarah.

"Tragically, no," I said. The whole thing was open across the whole front of the building, and empty. "It's a big space. I could stand up in here. And there's another crawlspace, above the crawlspace, going back over the office area. I never knew that before."

I climbed down and replaced the trapdoor. "Now I'm trying to think of what I can hide up there."

"Don't you already have a secret hideout?" asked Kelli.

"You can never have too many secret hideouts."

I went back into the back room and started printing another run of a rabbit-breeders magazine that we were going to be working on all day. As I noted down the date, I realized it was January 13th.

It was forty years since my suicide attempt. My first real adventure. My origin story.

Forty years ago, I'd made an attempt at suicide, explored what I'd thought was a haunted house, and wound up helping out an abused girl instead. I'd been sixteen years old. A lifetime ago.

I walked downstairs to my secret hideout. When I'd first started work, I'd explored the basement thoroughly, and discovered an alcove with a door and electricity in it. I'd moved in a desk, a chair, and then set up a computer, and now I had a fairly workable office down in the basement, where nobody else ever went.

It was haunted, too. The whole building was haunted by a ghost named Shirley, who'd been murdered in my basement during a robbery back in 1962. You get used to that.

I sat down at the computer. I often had messages from Jaydann or Chloe, and I took a few moments in my workday to teach them about historic research and paranormal investigation.

Jaydann was on. I'd been friends with her for like a month, and she'd become one of the people who kept me busy on slow days. There was a message from her.

I wonder if I can find anything on my uncle. He passed away when he was 12. His name was Jake Myers.

Ah, good. Something to keep me busy.

We can find this. Do you know if he's buried around here?

He's buried up at the cemetery by the high school.

Brown Cemetery? Or Sunnyside?

Like a three minute drive past the high school on the left.

That's Sunnyside. 

I’ve seen his grave one time in my life and I’ve never seen his obituary or like any newspaper thing. I don’t even know if my parents had any.

If it's there, we can find it.

Right there at the computer, I tried Findagrave. I came up with a couple of Jake Myers names in Sugar Valley, but nothing that matched what Jaydann was describing. Quite all right....That was only a beginning point.

I walked back upstairs and started another run of the rabbit magazine. The boss was walking across the floor, and he asked,"Everything going okay?"

"Found a trap door up above the display window."

He grinned. "It's probably been twenty years since I've been up there."

"Just checked it out. We can hide stuff up there."

"Well. Maybe not."

With fifty more copies of the rabbit magazine printing off, I started looking for more information. It;s nice having a boss who doesn't really care what I'm doing all day. The best place to begin looking for Graves in Clinton County is the Genealogical Society's Cemetery records. And guess who printed them, and therefore has extra copies? That's right, the print ship in the Hecht Building.

Those files were kept on a high shelf. I climbed up---I was doing a lot of climbing today---And retrieved the box for the Bald Eagle Township book. Procedure was to keep an extra copy for ourselves in case we needed to refer to it later, but it worked well for my historic research, too. I took out the extra book and looked in the index.

Twi possibles in Sunnyside. The first one was on page twenty-five, and I checked there. It paid off instantly; the times fit. It was him.

I walked back down to message Jaydann.

Found him. James W. Myers, Junior, Sunnyside Cemetery. 1988-2000. Section 1, Row 9, Plot 8. Born March 5, 1988, died February 23, 2000. Picture of a little dog on his grave.

Hmm interesting!!! I’ll have to go up there again sometime.

It's funny how, in every young boy friendship, there seems to always be one smart kid and one daredevil idiot. Mine is the smart one, When I got home, Paul had his little friend Nathan over when I got home from work, and they were playing in his room when I checked in.

"Oh, hi, Dad. How was your day?"

"Pretty good. I printed up a rabbit magazine."
"Rabbit magazine?!"
"It's about rabbits; they don't read it."

"Oh. Cool. We were just throwing stuff out my window. It makes a hard knock when it lands."
I decided I didn't want more details. "As you were," I said, and walked down to my office. he two of them reminded me of myself and my best friend Kline when I was a kid. We'd come up with stuff like that. Like Paul, I'd been the smart one.

I got on my laptop and messaged Jaydann.

Today was the forthieth anniversary of the day I tried to commit suicide as a teenager. You kept me busy and gave me something to work on, so thanks for that.

Oh my goodness .. 💔💔💔I’m so happy I gave you something to distract yourself. I’m so sorry you had to go through something that painful … 😓

Suicide is always hard on everyone. I’m glad you’re still here ❤️ you are valued !

"Goodnight, little man. I'll see you in the morning."

I kissed Paul on the forehead and left the bedroom. With everyone in bed, I got my KII meter out and took it downstairs. Just like work, my house is haunted. Seventeen-year-old Ida Yost had killed herself on the back porch in 1905. Even for a paranormal investigator, I spent an unbelievable amount of time hanging around haunted places.

I walked around the house a bit, getting nothing. In my place, the haunting tends to come in waves. Sometimes it will be active as hell, and then a couple of weeks ago by without my remembering that there's a ghost here. I sat down on the couch, and it spiked to red. I was interested for a moment, until I realized it was reading the nearby space heater. I'd have to tell the team about that.

I moved it over to the other side of the couch, where it calmed down.

"Hey, Ida," I said softly. Sometimes I do this, when everyone else is in bed. "How you doing? It's my anniversary. Forty years ago today, I tried to commit suicide."

Nothing on the KII. Well, hell. It was my anniversary, not hers.

"I think about it sometimes. You and I have a lot in common. I was sixteen when I tried, just one year younger than you. And mine was 1986; we were eighty-one years apart."

Butters came and settled down on the couch beside me.

"Hope you're doing well, Ida. Hope you're okay."

Just a little flicker on the meter. And then it stopped.

I went and got a snack, then sat back down to relax a bit before I went to sleep. You know what they say. It's the little things that make a haunted house into a haunted home.

Dead Reckoning

Ashlin was playing Bingo. Ashlin will attend any Bingo game she can get into. So she spent the time before the investigation marking off numbers and winning some prizes.

Chloe was working on the new Instagram. She'd volunteered to make a page for LHPS, so when she wasn't studying for school, she was working on the page.

Jaydann and Alexis, the new two, were looking into some of the old cemeteries. They'd taken an interest in some of the local spots, and had discovered a burial vault very near where they lived.

And me? I have no life. I spent the week leading up to the investigation digging into the history, looking up the building, and packing my equipment. My outfit was washed, my files were copied and packed. Batteries charged.

Ready for action.

"I'm so excited," said Jaydann.

I was with Jaydann and Alexis in the doughnut shop, which appeared to be becoming a regular thing. We were talking about the investigation that night, upcoming.

"I am, too," I admitted. "This is going to be good. It brings back memories for me....Eighteen years ago, when LHPS first formed, the first investigation where we really came together was a funeral home in Cameron County. Now, with our new team members, we have an investigation in an abandoned funeral home in Renovo."
"Full circle." commented Alexis.

Jaydann looked at her phone. "Oh my god, my spirit box arrived! Do you mind....."

I grinned. "Go get it. I know you've been dying for this."
She ran out to her car while I talked with Alexis for a while. Jaydann was back in ten minutes with her package, and I helped her open it with my Swiss Army knife.

She pulled out a compact electronic box with an antenna.

"It came with batteries, too!"

"Let's take a look," I said.

We spent a few minutes testing it out, checking to see what we could do with the box. I said,"Okay, looks like it has a lot of features---Temperature, EMFs, radio reception. Looks as if the thermometer takes a while to warm up---Which is okay; I got a few like that. If you get too close to it---" I held my finger over the device, and a red light came on. "It can detect both infrared and electromagnetic."

Jaydann's eyes shone. "I can't wait to try it out."
"You'll get your chance tonight," I said. "Investigation in a few hours."

Ashlin and I pulled up in the parking lot and got out of the car. Chloe had already arrived, and I gave her a hug, She was talking with Jaydann and Alexis. We gathered together....Me, Ashlin, and the three newest members.

LHPS. Together again....For the first time.

"Is that a Captain America backpack?" I asked Chloe as we got out of the car. "Are you using that for Ghost hunting?"

"Oh, no," she said. "I found it at the thrift store just before the investigation."

"Because that would be really cool."

We had arrived right on time, and we went into the building and met with some representatives of the Renovo Heritage Foundation, and Chris and Kate. The building was owned by Renovo Heritage, and in two halves. One half was their museum and headquarters, and the other half was abandoned Maxwell Funeral Home.

"Let's start with a walk-through," I said. "Everyone suit up."

I tossed Chloe her new LHPS t-shirt. It was just like mine, except with her name on it. She pulled it on over her turtleneck. Jaydann pulled on her ghost backpack. And I got on my hood and gloves, then the bandolier. And Chris led us over.

I heard the others gasp as we walked in the back door. The place was a big, old building, and it was filled with antique items and display stuff from Renovo Heritage. Alexis said,"Wasn't there some old embalming equipment in here?"

"Oh, that's up on the fourth floor," said Chris.

"Fourth floor? How big is this place?"

"This way to the stairs."

Jaydann's EMF detector immediately began going off when we hit the stairs, and we weren't even all the way up yet. Taking photos and readings, we walked up to the fourth floor, which had barely been touched over the years. Alexis gasped as we walked into the room with the undertaking stuff.

"Knew you'd like this," I said.

She looked it over. There were old, dusty needles and tubes, a facal reconstruction kit, and an autopsy table shoved against one wall. Slowly, taking it all in, she said,"Look....At....This."

"I want everyone to get photos, and a baseline on EMF and temperature," I said. Chloe, to her credit, already had her camera out and was snapping photos of everything she could. "Once we get all that, we'll sit down for an EVP session. I'm thinking we split into two rooms. Alexis and Jaydann, you guys can take this one, and I'll go with Ashlin and Chloe to the room down the hall."

We settled in, and I turned on my digital recorder. I sat down on the dusty floor, and we started our session. We were in the middle of asking questions when Jaydann called down,"Lou? We have a lot of EMFs going over here!"

We moved back over into the autopsy room, where Jaydann had her EMF detector on the table. It was flickering, spiking to red intermittently. Chloe laid hers down beside it, and it started doing the same thing.

"Alexis," I said,"You wanted to try laying down on this table. Now's your chance."

Alexis grinned and climbed up on the table, lying down with the EMF detectors. I watched her---It was just like what had happened eighteen years ago, up in Cameron County, except now I was the team leader, and back then it had been me on the table.

2008: I jumped up and lay down on the autopsy table. Everyone kind of choked except for Ailish, who took my picture. "Come on," I said, as I climbed off. "You're all going to see me like that sooner or later anyway. You may as well get used to the idea."

"You have a hard time being a grown-up, don't you, Lou?" asked Theresa.

"I don't know," I said. "I've never tried."

"You know, way back when, I said that if I was team leader, I'd let me do this," I commented. "A haunted autopsy table makes sense. Think of all the tragedies this thing saw over the years. Murders, suicides, accidents...They all ended up here. Have fun, Lex."

I was headed down the stairs with Chloe when Chris came back in below.

"Hey, Lou," he said. "We have some pizza over there, if you guys would like any."

"We can stop over and take a moment," I said. I hit my comlink. "Lex? You there?"

A moment passed. "I hear you."

"They got pizza in the Main building. We're gonna head over for a moment. You're welcome to join us if you like."

We walked over for a break. Chloe sat down on the floor with a bottle of water. Ashlin had a slice of pizza. A moment later, Alexis and Jaydann came in.

"We were getting more EMF activity up on four, Lou," said Jaydann.

"We'll go back over in a minute, and take a walk through the basement," I said. "I'd forgotten about the basement. Want some pizza?"

Chloe had gotten up and was standing beside the photocopier. I walked over the stand next to her.

"Thanks for joining the team," I said. "I'm proud of you."

She smiled.

"Thanks for inviting me."

I smiled back. 

"Hey. You're my sidekick."

We walked down into the basement, EMF detectors going. I had my laser thermometer out. "I'm getting a baseline in the fifties. Much warmer here than the rest of the building." I glanced over at Chloe. "You okay?"

"I'm fine."
"Be careful. I'm expendable. I don't want you hurt." I was a little surprised to realize how intensely protective I felt toward Chloe.

"I can be expendable," added Alexis. "I have to work tomorrow."

Hanging from the ceiling was a white shape that I assumed to be a glow-in-the-dark plastic Halloween spider, until I looked more closely. It was an actual spider, covered in bright white mold and hanging from the ceiling.

"Hunh. A moldy spider. You guys see this?"

"Oh, hell no," said Alexis.

"There's a few over here, too," said Chloe.

"What the hell is killng all these spiders down here?"

"You guys often see dead animals?" asked Chris.

"I had a bat fly at me once." I glanced at Ashlin. "Were you there for the bat?"

She grinned. "No, but I've heard the story. I love that."

I felt something dragging on my foot, and looked down. I had a piece of lathe board stuck to my boot with a nail, shoved up into the heel. I pulled it free and set it aside. "Careful, guys. I just stepped on a nail. Watch where you step."
"Are you okay?" asked Chloe.

"I'm fine. I'm glad I wore the steel-toed boots instead of my light sneakers, or I'd be headed for the hospital to get a tetanus shot now."

Everyone split off when we went back up to two. Jaydann and Alexis started checking the center area with the EMF detectors, and Ashlin and Chloe went looking at some of the artifacts in storage. Ashlin held up an old newspaper. From across the room, I could read the headline,"WE WIN."
"World War Two?" I called over.

She grinned. "Yeah."

Alexis was looking into a closet in the corner. She came out with a box of small cards, and a look of delight. "Look what I found! Are these....Toe tags???"

I walked midway up the stairs, to the landing. And I took a moment to look everything over.

Ashlin, one of the best friends I've ever had. Chloe, who was sweet enough to look up to me, in spite of my being the world's worst possible role model. And Jaydann and Alexis, who were rapidly working their way into my heart.

I watched, from the steps, looking at my team at work. The new LHPS team. And we were off to a really good start.

"Ghosting" someone means something entirely different in LHPS.

We finished back up on three.

We gathered in a circle, with a couple of EMF detectors on the floor. Jaydann set down her electronic bell and her new spirit box. She handed out a couple of small cat balls, little round toys that lit up.

"You guys can keep a couple of those," she said. "We have a bunch of them."

"I'll keep one," volunteered Chloe.

"I might hang onto one," I said. "They seem to work. You press the button and roll it in. It's like a ghost grenade."

I heard Chloe giggle beside me. Around the circle, everyone began asking questions, giving some space in between. I walked over to look out the big front window.

Eighteen years of this team. I was the only person who still remained from the beginning. And now we'd come all the way back around, with new members teaming up to investigate a haunted funeral home.

"Jesus christ, Lou!" said Alexis. "You scared me to death! I saw your image on the thermal and didn't know what it was at the window!"

"Thought I'd look out the window a moment," I said. "I know I look good that way."
One of the cat balls, the one nearest me, flickered brightly. Jaydann, standing next to me, looked over. "That wasn't you---"
"No," I agreed. "I was standing too far away." I stepped a little closer and tapped my foot on the floor to test it. Nothing happened. "That wasn't me."

"See how the EMF is staying consistently on two greens? That's weird."
"Usually they flicker. I don't see them doing that very much."

"Can you ring the bell?" Aexis asked. "Just go near it, and it should ring."

"That one might be a bit harder than the EMFs," I commented. "It takes more energy to do the bell than the lights."
"They both work off EMFs."
"Yeah, but---And this is called 'What Lou Thinks He Remembers His Dad Saying'----The lights just operate on electrical energy. For the bell to ring, that has to be turned into kinetic energy, which takes more of it. It's harder, on a physics level."

"Well, yeah, true."

I looked at my watch. "We should probably get packed up and ready to go. This thing has already gone on way longer than I'd expected."

"It's been great!" said Jaydann.

"Yeah, great investigation. But we have a drive home, and it's already nine-fifteen."

She gasped. "I didn't realize that much time had passed."

I grinned. "Does tend to sneak up on you, doesn't it?"

And then he bell went off.

Ding.

Do You Fear What I Fear: The 2025 Christmas Special

First thing in the morning, I took the dogs out. I plugged in the Christmas lights on the tree. I started coffee, and I was in the middle of making breakfast when the phone rang.

It was Chris. "Hey, Lou, I wanted to tell you this before you saw it on social media."
"Yeah?"
"Kate and I are having a baby."
I gasped. This was the best news I'd heard in about a year and a half.

"Oh my god oh my god! That's great! I am so happy for you!"

Chris laughed. "I wanted to tell you myself, as soon as I could. You deserve that. You're one of my best friends."

"You're mine." This had been true for about fifteen years, but I wasn't sure we'd ever admitted it aloud before.

"We're due sometime in early June. Right in the middle of the America 250th celebration, actually."

"Paul was born during Clinton County's 175th. He's going to be delighted. He'll want to play with your kid a lot."

"That won't be a problem."

After I got off the phone, Paul was stirring in his room. From upstairs, he called down,"Who was on the phone, Daddy?"

"That was Uncle Chris, little man. He called with big news. Uncle Chris and Aunt Kate are going to have a baby."

From the top of the stairs, Paul squealed with delight.

 

I walked into the doughnut shop and sat down across from Ashlin. "I kinda like meeting here," I said. "On Sunday nights, it's basically deserted, and we have the place to ourselves."

Ashlin nodded. "I'm all for it."

I handed Paul a gift card. "One of my editors gave me a card. There's twenty-five dollars on this, kid. Go nuts."

He ran off to the kiosk. I sipped my coffee. "We have one new member, Chloe. I've invited a couple of others, including my friend Chris. I think he'd been a good member, if he can find the time."

Ashlin grinned. "I'd invite someone, but I don't know anyone. At least, no one I'd trust on an investigation."

"We've got a couple of good ones coming up. I hope to schedule a return to that Main Street house in December---You remember the one we did a couple of years ago? They're having activity again. And there's another place in Sugar Valley that's contacted me. And, hopefully in January, there's an abandoned funeral home in Renovo."

"Oooh, that one sounds good," she said.

"You'll love it. Some of the equipment is still there."

"So I get to lay down on a morgue table."
I laughed. "I did that on the first investigation LHPS ever had. It was a funeral home up in Cameron County. I was about your age, and I did, in fact, lay down on a morgue table."

"I mean, how many chances do you get?"

"Usually just the one. I think we may get an upswing in activity soon. You know how construction can make the ghosts act up?" Ashlin nodded. I continued,"Well, the White House is said to be very haunted. As far back as the Lincoln administration, there were sightings. With Trump ripping down the East Wing, it may stir something up."
"It's always something with him. I miss the days we had boring presidents."

"Yeah. Me too. I e-mailed the White House to ask if there was an increase in activity. They said it was too soon to tell. And now I'm probably on three or four watchlists."

"Worth it."

"I've noticed that sightings see to increase in times of turmoil. The Civil War. Covid. There's always an upswing in paranormal activity. Well, nobody can deny that the country is in turmoil right now. I'm expecting there may be a lot of activity. We may be pretty busy."
Ashlin grinned. "It's about time."

One of the bad things about being a high-profile paranormal investigator is that people will find you. It can also be one of the good things. I wasn't sure which one this was yet.

I was in the doughnut shop drinking my coffee when the two women came in. Both young. One dark-haired, one lighter-haired with glasses.

They sat down with me, and I said,"So you're Jaydann and Alexis."

They nodded. "We've been on your tours," Jaydann said. The dark-haired one.

"I thought you looked familiar! Sorry it took me this long to recognize you."

She waved that away. "We wanted to learn how to hunt ghosts."
"We did Gettysburg recently, and wanted to learn more," added Alexis.

"You should know that I don't work with psychics," I said. "I've had some bad experiences with people who claimed to be psychic, but were actually either just pretending, or straight-up con artists."

"That's okay." said Jaydann. "We're not claiming to be psychic."

"I'll believe that some people might be, but not as many as they think," said Alexis.

"Okay, that's reasonable. You already have some equipment?"

"EMF detectors, cat balls, recorders, a thermal camera."

"That's a good start. My advice is to just go ahead and buy all of it. You're gonna end up with it all anyway, so you might as well get it over with. Do you know how to do any of the historical research?"

"Not yet, no," sad Jaydann. "But we were hoping that's something you could teach us."

"Do either of you have any first aid experience?"

"Both of us," said Jaydann. "I'm a home health aide."

"I'm certified in CPR and AED," Alexis told me.

I considered it, and decided to take a chance on these two. I dug into my backpack and pulled out two applications, and slid them across the table.

"Interested in joining the Lock Haven Paranormal Seekers?"

Jaydann smiled. "Yes!"

"Fill out these applications and get them back to me. We've had some changes lately and I've been looking  for new members. I think you two would be good. We'll arrange some sort of a training session for you; maybe one of the local cemeteries. I've gotten a lot of reports of a house in my neighborhood being highly haunted, but we don't investigate private homes unless we're invited. We have one of those coming up in January. I'm trying to rebuild our team, and looking for the best of the best."

"We won't let you down," said Jaydann.

"I know," I said. "I have a good feeling about you two."

"Hey, kiddo." I looked in Paul's room from the hall. He was sitting on the bed with his phone. "Get this. There's a comet going by Earth; it's called 3I Atlas. I've been following the news for a couple months. It's from outside our solar system, some people think it's created by aliens, and it'll be at its closest point to Earth tonight. Want to go check with me later, if it's clear?"

"Okay, probably," said Paul.

"Maybe we'll go around the corner and check out a haunted property, too," I said. "People have been contacting me about 425 South Highland, and it's been a little slow lately. Want to come along?"

"Sure."

I walked down the hall to my office. I had a couple of hundred years of research and files lining the walls, and I sat at my desk and pulled the city directories.

I could hear the wind blowing outside. Winter had arrived; we had cold weather and an ongoing windstorm for the last few days. Yeti weather.

425 South Highland. The best way to find out about a haunting is to find out who lived there, and then who died there. In 1926, the place had been owned by the Honetor family. George Honetor. I went to the cemetery directories, and looked him up. He was buried out in Rest Haven, but he had two babies not far away in Fairview. 

Kenneth Honetor had been born in 1931, and died after two days. Harry Honetor had been four days old when he died in 1937. It appeared that the family had been living in the house at the time.

There they were. It was always something; chances are when I looked into it, I'd find the reason. That was the reason behind 425....Two dead babies.

The winter solstice---Shortest amount of daylight in the year. I looked outside to see if it was dark enough to see the stars, and it was---It had begun getting dark around four-thirty. I went upstairs and looked into Paul's room, and found him asleep on the bed. Robin never does this to Batman.

I went downstairs and pulled on my coat. It was about twenty-eight degrees out. Nice night for a walk.

In the yard, I looked around at the sky. I saw a bright light that may have been 3I Atlas, and watched it for a while. Then I walked down the street, looking at the Christmas lights. Several of the neighbors had their lights on in a cluster of homes; the street was lit right up. There was a really cool-looking reindeer made of lights in a yard half a block down. Someone had Christmas music playing: Silent night....Holy night....All is calm....All is bright....

I turned onto South Highland. I'd lived in this neighborhood for over twenty years; I knew which house was which. As I walked up the block, I turned on my EMF detector.

It was the all-in-one, which had a thermometer on it. I wasn't getting any sign of EMFs, but I noticed something as I got closer to the house---The temperature was reading fifty-five.

I had a heavy coat and my hood on. It was nowhere even remotely near fifty-five.

The lights at 425 were off; nobody appeared to be home. I walked around the yard a little bit, and the detector spiked as high as fifty-seven. When I walked away on the sidewalk, it began dropping again, until it hit the twenties. Still no EMFs.

Now, that was weird. I turned and walked past again, and this time, nothing. No temperature spikes, nothing.

I'd have to do a little more digging. I headed back to the house. It was cold out there.

"Careful on the ice."

We pulled up in Saint Agnes Cemetery and got out of the car---Me and the new two, Alexis and Jaydann. I was walking carefully on the ice sheet, sticking mostly to the grass, which had a bit more traction. Jaydann was just a head of me. Alexis, who seemed to have considerably better balance than either Jaydann or myself, was strolling casually across the icy road.

"I brought my new pack," commented Jaydann.

I grinned. "You got the ghost backpack!" Her new pack, with all her equipment in it, had sketches of little ghosts all over it. I'd worn the usual outfit with the shoulder strap, which was easy to throw a heavy coat over. I was wearing the heavier hood; it was about twenty-eight degrees out.

"The grave we're looking for is over here," I said, leading them across the cemetery. "A murdered man whose ghost was reported as attending his own funeral. When they got out here, the strap that was being used to lower the coffin in wrapped around a pallbearer's leg and almost pulled him into the grave. The pallbearer was arrested as being the murderer, but not convicted."

"Whoa," said Alexis.

"About here, near this tree." I looked around. "Maybe under the snow. I didn't completely think this through. But it's right around here, so let's check it out."

Alexis got out her thermal imager and began checking around. Jaydann borrowed mine, and said,"This thing is about to die."

"Really?" I glanced over. "Yeah, looks like I need to change the batteries. Yours is better anyway. Let me get a few photos."

I clicked some shots, and Alexis said,"Do you hear that?"

I stopped and listened. "I hear something---"

"From up there. I'm hearing what sounds like footsteps."

"An animal maybe?"

"Would have to be an awfully big heavy deer. It sounds like a human."

"I don't see anything. I'm getting photos." I got out my camera and snapped several shots, which is procedure.

We walked out from under the tree, into more of a clear area. I heard the footsteps again, up above us on the hill. Alexis said,"There---"

"Yeah." I got some more photos and set my digital recorder on a gravestone. "Going to recording. December at six-forty-five PM, Saint Mary's Cemetery. Lou."

"Jaydann."

"Alexis."
"Is anyone here?"

I liked these two. I couldn't help it. They were enthusiastic, dedicated, and willing to learn. They were also kind of fun to spend time with.

Alexis was clicking photos with her phone. She said,"Look at this one."

Her photo showed the cemetery, looking downhill, but it had an odd streak in it. I said,"Is it still snowing? It doesn't really seem to be, does it?"

"And it's going sideways," said Jaydann.

"It is," I agreed. "The wind isn't blowing enough to make it go horizontal like that."

"You think we have something?"

"We might," I agreed. "You two are good. I spent a couple of months considering people for new members, and none were quite right. And the you two showed up. You're the best Christmas gift I could ask for. You want to see Fairview Cemetery on the way home?"

For the record, I wouldn't much mind being visited by three ghosts for Christmas, but that hasn't yet happened to me. Occasionally I encounter the one I live with. Mostly, it's just the family and me getting together for Christmas dinner.

"Paul," I said,"I have one more present for you." I reached into my pocket and handed him my old Swiss Army knife---The one I'd recently replaced. "This is for you now. You've earned it. Take care of it."

Paul smiled. "Okay," he said.

"I thought, since you liked this one better, you can have it," I said. "If you don't really want it right now, I can keep it until you're ready."

"No," he said. "I want it."

All Well And Good

I was in a haunted house, which was not unusual. I had a cup of coffee, which is also not unusual. Oh, and the haunted house was mine and I live there.

I pushed open the door to Paul's room and walked in. "Time to get up, guys," I said. "We've got a holiday trip to make."

Paul was on the bed, and his little friend Rylan was on the air mattress on the floor. Paul already seemed to be somewhat awake, which was actually a bit unusual.

"Okay," said Paul.

"You guys want breakfast?" I asked. "We won't be stopping until Grandpa's house."

"Um. Cereal," said Paul. "The pink one."

"I'll take the green," said Rylan.

"I'll get them ready," I said. "You guys get up and get yourselves going. Dress for adventure."

"Okay, when we get down to the light, turn right instead of going straight across to the bridge," I said. "That will take us to the cemetery."
"I know where we're going," said Michelle.

We got to the bottom of the hill, and the bridge was blocked off anyway. I said,"Well, I guess we have to turn right regardless."

"I seem to recall this last year, too," Michelle said.

Paul shook his head. "How long does it take them to fix this bridge?"

"When I was eighteen, they did some repairs on the Morgan Bridge uptown, and it took a whole summer," I said. 

"It's already been way longer than that."

We drove up Main and turned at the fireman statue....All of these streets and buildings I'd grown up with. Just outside of Slatington, along 873, I said,"Up here. On the left. There's a church, and then the cemetery."

Michelle pulled in, and I got my camera out. I said,"Here we are. The people who  built Grandpa's farm in 1836 are buried here. You guys can stay in the car or come along with me; either way."

"I'm coming," said Paul. "Let me get my sneakers on."

"I'm coming, too," said his little friend Rylan.

We climbed out of the vehicle. I said,"We're looking for Newhart or Newhard. It's been since before you were born, Paul, but I was here years ago researching the family. I remember them being back this way, toward the back."

We walked across the cemetery together. The graves were about where I remembered them, way back to the far end of the cemetery. Newhart. The family who'd built the farm I'd grown up on.

I spotted two of the graves---Eva, the mother, and her baby. They'd both died in 1922, very close together. I said,"Paul, see this?"

"Yeah."

"When you see a lot of close dates like that, especially young people, it tells me something  You have your phone? Look up '1922 epidemic.' Wait, I'm going to guess it's Spanish flu."

Paul got out his phone. "Nineteen twenty two.....Epidemic?" he asked me.

I nodded. "Yep."

A moment later, he said,"That's right. Spanish flu."

"That explains a lot. If the farm is haunted, these two are possibilities. A mother and child who died of Spanish flu together. Come on, let's get back to the car. Next stop, Grandpa's."

The farm was the way I"d remembered it. It always was. We got out, and my brother was at work, standing by the barn.

I hugged him. "Hi, Jon."

"Glad you made it safe. Hey, Paul, you're looking good!" This was Jon's way of mentioning that he'd noticed Paul's new glasses without actually drawing attention to the glasses.

Paul grinned. "Thanks."

"We've got a present for you. It's down in the house. I want you to learn how to play it."

"So," I said,"It's either a game or a musical instrument. Amy around?"

"She's in the new barn."

I walked over to the new barn, where my sister-in-law Amy was manning the counter, selling jams and giving away hot chocolate. I was wearing my sweatshirt with a ghost drinking coffee. It had warmed up a bit, so I was able to get away with my black puffy vest. I'd basically dropped the vest look, but I still loved this one.

I hugged Amy. "Got a present for you."

I handed her a paperback book with an orange cover. "Ghost Stories of the Lehigh Valley," by Adams.

"Oooh, thank you," she said. "I like reading this stuff."

"My brother told me you were asking about local hauntings, and I thought this one would help. It's used----I was actually going to buy one on Amazon, and then I realized I had an extra in my office. I'm pretty picky about my ghost books, but this guy is good. I met him once; I had a booth next to him at the Albatwtich Festival a couple of years ago."

"Thank you," she said. "I never got much sense that this place was haunted, but...."

"Dad used to tell me stories," I said. "Once he told me one about a shadow figure in the meadow. And when he moved in, he said there was a sound on the stairs like a ball bouncing down."

"Now that you mention it, I do remember him telling that one."

"I was never sure just how much of this was real, and how much to entertain me as a kid."

Amy grinned. 

I said,"I'm sort of keeping an eye on reports lately. In times of national crisis, there tends to be an upswing in activity. Not sure if that's actual, or just people being under stress and misinterpreting stuff. But there's no denying we're under national stress right now."

"No, there's not."

"So with President Asshole tearing down the East Wing, and the 250th anniversary of America coming up, I'm watching to see if there's an increase in paranormal activity. Particularly along historic lines. By the way, that reminds me---We stopped at the cemetery where the people who founded this farm are buried."

"Where's that?"

"Behind the church up along 873. I did the research almost twenty years ago."
She nodded. "Okay, I know that one."

"It looks like you have two people on the farm who died of Spanish flu. So that could be a possibility."

"People have died in the house?"

"Hell, my mother died in the house."

"Oh, that's right."

"So there may be an increase in the next few months. Let me know."

Miles, the family beagle, watched as I walked around the kitchen with my EMF detector, taking a few readings. I wasn't getting anything much yet. Paul loved Miles; the two had been born very close together, and had grown up together. My brother had gotten Miles as a puppy when Paul was only a couple of months old.

"Is that your ghost detector?" Dad asked me.

"More or less. It's an all-in-one EMF detector---It detects electromagnetic fields, but also does temperature. It's nice when I don't want to be carrying around a lot of different pieces of equipment." I was willing to talk about ghost-hunting in general, but I wasn't about to start explaining EMFs to a retired electrical engineer.

The place had nothing, EMF-wise. Which I'd about have expected, offhand. Dad would have the house wired up very professionally, which meant my baseline would be zero. Which was, in its way, good news---Any flicker was likely to be something unexplainable.

Paul and Rylan were eating the pizzas Michelle had heated up for them, and Miles was lurking about in the hopes he might manage to get some, too. I walked outside.

At the jeep, I got in my pack and pulled out the travel outfit for ghost hunting. It was a small pouch on a shoulder strap, smaller than the one I'd use at home, but easy enough to carry in my backpack. I slung it over my shoulder; now I was ready to go.

I looked around the farm, not as it is currently, but trying to view it as it would have been in 1836. This was harder than usual; while I could easily see this stuff in Clinton County, this wasn't some historic site---This was just the place I'd grown up. It took some effort to get myself into the right mindset.

The barn was odd. I'd never noticed it before, but the barn was a much older architecture than I'd realized. I was used to barns being double-level and having some sort of ramp access to the second floor, which would have been typical of the late 1800s. This one didn't have that, which put it much older---Previous to a lot of the large farm equipment that would have existed later.

The house was definitely pre-1840 design. I'd never noticed that as a kid, but now it jumped out at me. The house, the springhouse, the old servant's quarters---My room had once been the old servant house. It was now connected and part of the main house, but it hadn't always been. I wondered who the servants might have been. I could maybe find that out if I could get my hands on the census records.

No EMFs near the house or the barn. I walked down across the yard, looking around. This was the place I'd grown up, the place I'd basically begun. My origin story. Generations of people had lived here, and I was one of them. I;d grown up here, having adventures in these woods. I'd looked for ghosts, monsters, and buried treasures throughout my childhood, and never really outgrown that. One of these days, I was going to visit for the last time, and I'd never even know it. One of these days, one of us was going to be the last sibling alive. Odds are it wasn't going to be me.

I knew there was an old well down in the forest near the old pond. I'd discovered in in the woods when I was a kid; it was likely older than the house. I walked down that way.

The pond, in which I'd tried to catch water monsters when I was young, was largely overgrown these days. I could see the old well through the trees. I walked around a bit, waving the EMF detector.

There. A flicker---It rose a couple of points and then went back down.

"That's more like it."

No power lines nearby. No reason there should have been a reading here. I walked around, circling the well, getting spikes here and there. Settlers in those days would likely have dug the well before they'd even constructed the house---You need water before you need shelter, and crops and cattle weren't going to wait around until you'd constructed your living room. So as I investigated, this would be a hot spot.

Of course---The story Dad had told me about the ghost in the meadow. The stream began up here and ran down that way. This was all connected with that one small waterway; if I followed this stream down, I'd end up in the same meadow. I'd investigated that a few years ago, and got a photo we couldn't entirely explain.

I walked back to the barn, where Amy was making a wreath. She asked me,"Find any ghosts?"

"Well, maybe," I said. "You never do know."

"So, what did you learn in the cemetery today?" I asked. I was sitting in the Jeep, two Christmas trees tied to the roof, doing my annual panicking for the entire trip home.

"Nothing," declared Paul. He was playing his present, which had turned out to be a keyboard. He was actually making some progress at sounding good with it.

"Nothing? No?"

"Oh, wait....Yeah. When you see the same year a lot, check for epidemics and stuff."

"Especially in younger people. You got it."

"Are we stopping for dinner? I'm getting hungry."

"We'll stop as soon as we see a good place," said Michelle.

About half a mile down the road, Paul made the kind of discovery that he likes to make.

"Look! There! A Taco Bell!"

Water Under The Bridge

"Next on the tour," I said, stopping at the corner of Grove and Water Streets,"Is the Susquehanna River. You can't see it because of the dike right now, but you all know it's there. This is the home to a water cryptid known as the Susquehanna Seal. The Susquehanna Seal was reported in newspaper articles back in the 1800s, a large, snaky creature living in the river."
At the front of the crowd was a kid, who was getting more and more excited as I spoke. He held a hand up, and I said,"You have a question?"

"He just wants to tell you something," said the kid's father. "Go on."

"This creature was known to brush up against lumber rafts, dumping the lumbermen into the water. People reported hearing it howling at night. It's theorized that it might have been a leftover Hynerpeton, a prehistoric creature whose fossil was discovered here in 1993."

As we walked down Water Street to the next stop, a haunted hotel, the kid told me,"I saw that! We were fishing near the bridge down there, over there....."

"The Jay Street Bridge," added the father.

"And I saw this thing in the water! My cousin and me saw it! It was long and black, and had like a hump on the back."

"They both really freaked out," said the father. "Something there scared them very badly."

"About what time of year was this?"

"About seven o'clock," the kid said. "It was a Saturday....."

"What time of year?" his father prompted.

"Oh. About fall, I guess. Back around a year ago."

"Well," I said. "Things have been a little slow lately. I'm going to have to look into this. You've just given me my next investigation."

"Dad, can I open your package?" Paul likes opening packages that come in the mail. He doesn't much care what's in them. I was cooking dinner, so I kind of waved my hand and let him do it.

He slid a small box out of the package. "What's this?"

"That's my new Swiss army knife," I said. He was turning it over in his hands.

"It's too big," he declared. "Look at this!"
"It's got more stuff on it than the old one. Got a compass, a wrench. The pliers has two settings."

The thin was bright red, about an inch thick. It had a curvy, smooth, aerodynamic handle and weighed about a pound. It had at least fifty different tools on it. I could repair anything with it. I could fix La Llorona's marriage. I could repair the Silver Bridge.

"Too much stuff for me to memorize," he said, and handed it to me. "I don't like it."

"I'm gonna give it some time, see what I think," I said. "I'll carry this one around a while and see how it works for me."

I was n the middle of folding brochures when Tom called back,"Lou? Kelli wants to see you when you have a minute."

"Coming up now," I said.

I stood up and walked across the print shop to the front office. The office manager, Kelli, was sitting at her desk with a map up on the screen.

"Did you know Bigfoot's been sighted neat Penn State?" she asked.

I love my current co-workers.

I grinned. "I saw that this morning! I was drinking my coffee and I saw a news article about it. Thinking I might look into it."

"Want me to print you out a copy of the map? It shows exactly where he was seen."

"Sure. That helps. It always pays to go take a look at the site, if possible."

"Coming through. In color." She printed it out on one of the big copiers, and I picked it up and folded it in half.

"Thanks, Kelli. I'll let you know what I find."

After work, I biked over to the Jay Street Bridge. It was a clear, cool day. I biked midway across the bridge---Over the Lock Haven city limit into Woodward Township. I got off and looked at the area.

Always visit the site. It's what I try to teach people. You never know what you might discover, so always visit the site of the paranormal experience if you can. This was where the kid had spotted the Susquehanna Seal.

I got out a pair of compact binoculars and looked out over the river. Nothing yet. There wasn't much point in getting out the litmus paper and doing a test on the water; I'd tested the Susquehanna dozens of times before. I knew it could support life. 

My cell phone rang. I dug it out my my pack.

"Hey, little man. What's up? Yeah, I'm on my way home. Yeah, I can pick up a sub for you. Meatball? Okay. Home in about ten minutes, kid."

I stood in my son's bedroom, disassembling his giant bunk bed so I could put together the new bed. When you're a parent, you wind up doing things like that.

"You remember the Bigfoot sighting along I-80?" I asked Paul, who was sitting at his desk in the chair.

He nodded. "I remember you told me there was one, yeah."

Just a kid and his dad, discussing cryptids. Parenting moments.

"Been looking into that. I've checked the maps and made a few calls. It might help if you could come up with some excuse to get your mom to drive us to State College; we could stop and check the site along the way."

"I'm on it," said Paul. "I would have anyway. I'm thinking Crumbl Cookie."

"Right now, my working theory is that it's a hoax. Probably a prank from some idiot Penn State fratboy; they're known for stupid shit like that. I checked, and it happened the night before Homecoming. And, yes, the State College Spirit Halloween did have Bigfoot costumes."

"Hey! You went to Spirit Halloween without m---"

"I didn't go there, I just called. It is not so easy to explain that you don't actually want a costume, you just wanted to know if they previously had them. But they did, which is where the costume could have come from. A visit to the site will explain more."

Paul nodded, looking over my work. I took out my new knife and started unscrewing a bolt. He said,"I still don't like the new knife. Too much stuff for me to memorize."

"You'll get used to it."

"Will we have the new bed built in time for bedtime?"

"Probably. This is coming along okay. But I'll let you sleep on the couch until I do get it done, if not."

"Okay. Bet."

"Dad, you want to do something? I'm bored."

Paul had woken up with a stomachache and a sore arm from the day before, so I'd decided to give him a mental health day from school. The illness had lasted until about eleven-thirty, at which point he'd decided it was safe to be up and around.

"You got something in mind?" I asked.

He shook his head. "If you can think of something we can do....."

"How about we take a walk down to the river? I was thinking of taking a walk. The river is low because there's a drought right now, and I wanted to take a look."

"Can we ride our bikes?"

"I don't see why not."

A few minutes later, we were riding our bikes down near the water. We stopped and got off, looking at the river from the top of the dike. I climbed up on a guardrail and looked.

"You know we're right on the city limit?" I asked.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. You know what city limits are?"

"That's where you leave Lock Haven and you're in Castanea."

"Pretty much, except here it's Woodward Township. That's right there, across the river. We can see it from here."

"So if we go over there---" Paul gestured out across the river. "---We're in Woodward?"

"Yep. Did I tell you I got a Susquehanna Seal sighting?"

"I thought it was Bigfoot."

"Him too. But also the Susquehanna Seal. I've been checking, but nothing has turned up."

"Is the Susquehanna Seal hibernating?"

"Could be. You know hibernation?"

"We learned about hibernation in school. Isn't that where animals sort of sleep, but for the whole winter?"

"Yeah, that's basically it. Bears do it. A lot of fish and reptiles do it, too. So it's reasonable to assume the Susquehanna Seal might, as well."

"Are we going to see the Susquehanna Seal in the spring?"

"I mean, we can hope. You want to go home and watch that horror movie on Plex you've been wanting to see?"
Paul lit up. "Yeah!"

"So I'll have to check out the Susquehanna Seal later. It's like it always is with the Susquehanna Seal....The case has gone cold."

I was watching the mile markers as we rode along the highway toward Centre County. I saw the sign on the county line, and I said,"The Bigfoot sighting is up ahead, about six miles."

"Oh yeah?" Paul said, looking up from the back of the car. He said,"It's on the way to the movie?"

"Well, it's on the way to State College."

"I really wanted to see the movie in State College. I'm gonna eat about $3.50 worth of popcorn. It's why I asked Mom." I was going to have to up the kid's allowance.

"Bigfoot?" his little friend Noah asked. "Really?"
"Yeah, there was a sighting right up ahead."

"Is Bigfoot real? If I saw Bigfoot, I'd have to kick him and run away."
There was a lot to unpack there. I said,"Well, nobody knows if Bigfoot's real or not. Or any cryptid. It's why I investigate. Panda bears, gorillas, and platypuses were all thought to be imaginary, until somebody found one for sure. So nobody knows for sure if Bigfoot's real."

"Really? Pandas?"

"Yeah, they were thought to be made-up. Now, there really aren't a lot of credible reports of Bigfoot actually attacking people. They mostly seem to run away. They're probably pretty shy."

"Have you ever seen a UFO?" Noah asked.

"A couple."

"Really? Were they cool?"

"Pretty cool. Mostly just lights in the sky...."

"Remember that one we saw in Maryland?" Paul asked.

"I remember."

I watched the side of the road as we approach mile marker 169. Always visit the site, even if it's driving by. Along I-80, there's no place to stop. 

I could see across the edge of the highway and the nearby field, where Jacksonville Road swerved surprisingly close to Eighty.

I looked at the layout; always visit the site if you can. Bigfoot had been spotted within an easy walking distance, moving away from the overpass. Farm Lane ran down and underneath I-80. I looked down that way.

It was basically clear, much clearer than most of what bordered on the interstate. The trees were clear for a bit, and I could see where someone could easily jump the guardrail and run down the bank to get to a waiting car.

Paul asked,"See Bigfoot?"

"Pretty sure I see the answer behind that sighting," I said. "Looks like it was a college student, probably on a dare or something. Put on a discount Halloween costume, got spotted along the highway, then ran down the bank to a getaway car."

"At least you solved one," said Paul.

I nodded. "I'll take it as a win. I'm happy to figure these things out, even if it turns out to be a hoax. I got the Bigfoot sighting, and the Susquehanna Seal isn't going anywhere."

I sat in the theater, watching the second "Wicked" installment. Paul sat next to me with his popcorn, and a bottle of soda. He leaned over and whispered,"Can I use your knife, Daddy?"

I handed him the new knife. He opened the bottle opener and used it to pry open his soda bottle before handing it back to me.

"Maybe the new knife isn't so bad," he said.