#101: Stop The Presses

I burst through the door and ran down the hall in the haunted house. I was wearing my ghost-hunting uniform, and had a flashlight in one hand and a laser thermometer in the other. I turned and checked inside one room, finding nothing, and then spun to the next room. Nothing. I raced down the hall toward the stairs.

Swiftly, I bolted up the stairs, shoving open the door and getting into the kitchen.

Five people sat around the kitchen table. Glancing around in some conclusion, I said,"Thought I heard a sound come through on the recorder."

One of the men looked at me. "That was probably my cell phone," he said. "It rang a minute ago."

"It was kind of a thumping sound----"

"Yeah, I use a smackdown from WWE."

I sighed. This whole thing was getting out of hand, and I'd about had enough of this one. Turning to the homeowner, a young woman in her early twenties, I said,"There were only supposed to be two of you in the house."
"I know, but they came over, and I couldn't send them home," she said. "My neighbor is a psychic. She's coming over later, too."

"A---"

"She's a psychic. She says the house is haun---"

"I'm gonna stop you right there," I said, holding up one hand. "Psychics aren't real. They don't provide any evidence."

"Yeah, but---"

"Your next line is 'She told me things she couldn't have known.' Right?" I could tell by her face that I'd gotten pretty close. "Stop and think. What exactly did she tell you?"
"When I was younger, I had a miscarriage. She knew the baby's name."

"Uh-huh. You ever post it on Facebook? No, wait---I've got it. Did she tell you an actual name plus the circumstances, or did she say something like 'I'm sensing the letter C' and you filled in the rest?"

"Well...."

"Yeah, I thought so." I picked up my bag and slung it over my shoulder. "Your house isn't haunted. I'm outa here."

My name is Lou. I live in Lock Haven, Pennsylvania, and I do a lot of things. I'm a librarian. I'm a writer. And I'm a paranormal investigator. Sometimes that's great. Sometimes it's a bust.

I was pulling on my tac vest when my son Paul found me in my office. 

"Where are you going?" he asked. "Is it a ghost hunt?"

"Not this time, not really," I said. "There's a girl with cancer named Ellie. I talked to her mom, and I asked if there was anything I could do. She told me that it would cheer Ellie up a lot to do an investigation with me, so I'm going to go down and play Make-A-Wish foundation; show her some of my equipment."

"Can I come?" Paul asked.

"Get your vest."

A moment later, we left the house, walked one block down the street, and into Ellie's house, which we could see from our own yard.

I'd met Ellie's mom Erin a couple of years ago, waiting in line to vote. I'd never met her kids before. Ellie was a young, blonde college student, and she had a dark-haired younger sister, Allison. As we sat down, Erin said,"Allison is going into kindergarten this year."

"You're gonna love kindergarten," Paul assured her. "You get to sing, and play at recess, and color and stuff."

I smiled. "So, Ellie, your mom says you'd like to learn about ghost hunting."

Ellie smiled shyly. "I'm into that."

"Well, we brought down some of our equipment to show you," I said. "We can plan a ghost hunt in a few days, I think, but I figured we'd start with a little lesson."

Paul tapped me on the shoulder. "Can I give her the present?"

"Sure."

Paul handed Ellie a laser thermometer I'd ordered for her. I said,"That's for you, Ellie. I wanted to bring you a little gift. Don't get discouraged. You're gonna beat this thing."

One of the perks of being me is that I get to just stroll into wherever I want. Like the library after hours, or the local abuse shelter, or in this case, the newsroom of the local newspaper.

It was a slow day. Laura, the editor, and Arianna, the graphic designer, were the only two in the newsroom. I'm old enough to remember it being filled with older, seasoned reporters. And, little by little over the years, the staff got younger. Now it's a bunch of people much younger than me, which I actually like.

"Hey, Lou!" said Laura. "What can we do for you?"

"Wanted to make you guys an offer." I sat down. "I'm looking for a few ways to be more fulfilled in my career lately. Work isn't cutting it.....Anyway, not your problem.....But one of the things I thought of was to go back to my column every week, instead of every two weeks. I used to do that, until we had to cut it back in 2016."

"Was that for that literacy column?" Arianna asked.

"That's the one."

"She drove us crazy," Arianna said matter-of-factly.

Laura nodded. "Sure, we can run you every week. Want to start now?"

"I already have the piece for the tenth in. Let me start after that. I'm not even asking for more money."

"Oh, I'll pay you," said Laura.

"By the way," said Arianna,"If you could send in your October ghost stories a little early and give me a heads-up on the graphics, that would help a lot."

"I can do that. I'm almost done with them now."

"We'd love to get you guys into this building," said Laura. "We think the old editor, Rebecca Gross, is still haunting the place. We could do an investigation and get a whole article out of it."

"That'd be cool," I said. "I'd actually love to do that. Let me talk to the team."

"I'll ask the publisher. We may be able to do this thing."

"That'd be great. I could actually use an investigation like that. You have no idea."

"Hi....We're here to see Lou?"

I heard it from back at my desk. It's one of the side effects of being right out in the open, in the oldest part of the library. I dream of one day having walls. I was expecting this one, though. I stood up and met Erin and Ellie as they entered my office area.

"Hi, guys," I said. "Come on up. Let's do some investigating."

I led them upstairs, to the old bedroom. Ellie looked around with some wonder---The place was built for a mayor of Lock Haven, and really is impressive. "Whoa," she said. "Look at all this."

"We're working on making it into a break room, but no idea when that's ever going to happen," I said. "Here, you can borrow my EMF detector, if you like. Let's get some readings."

We walked around the room, checking temperature and electricity, taking photos. Erin said,"Thank you for giving Ellie something to look forward to, Lou. This means a lot."

"Of course," I said. "The surgery is Friday, right?"

Ellie nodded. "We're going to Danville Friday morning."

"I'll send you a couple of my books, to read while you're resting. Also I remember hearing something about a haunted cemetery in Danville, someplace near the hospital. I'll look that up; maybe you can see it from your window."

Ellie smiled. "Thanks."

"We're nervous," said Erin.

"Understandable," I said. "Working on the money situation, too. I've seen your fundraising online."

"It's all going to be tough to afford," said Erin.

I had a thought.

"Erin, I'd like to do a haunted tour for you guys," I said. "I can't pay off all your bills, but I can help out a bit, maybe make a couple hundred dollars. I can do it up in our neighborhood, but I won't do it without your permission. What do you think?"

"That would be really cool," said Ellie.

"Yes," said Erin. "Thank you."

"Is Lou here?"

I can hear people come in at the main desk around the corner, but I can never be sure whether to hide or not until it's too late. Claire said,"Yeah, he's right at his desk."

Older guy, stained T-shirt. Gray hair that looked like he'd combed it with, at best, a mop. He stopped by my desk and said,"You wrote that article about the Flatwoods Monster."

"Yes," I said. "I did."

"That's pretty good. You read the book about the Flatwoods Monster? A guy investigated that. I had a teacher once who told me what really happened with the UFOs in Washington in 1952. The whole Air Force got surrounded. Now, how did they cover that up? You know what else they covered up? Lovecraft. Some people think the Necronomicon isn't real, but it is."

Shoulda hid.

I get these conspiracy nuts, some of them genuinely insane, who come to talk to me form time to time. They don't have a whole lot of people who want to hear this, so they latch onto me. I don't much want to hear it either, but they don't care.

"Now, I got a buddy who tells me about that bus accident, out on the railroad tracks near the prison. Is that real?"

"Nope," I said.

He somehow managed to look honestly surprised. "No?"

"No. What you're talking about is a gravity hill, where a train kills kids on a bus. And cars roll uphill, out of the way. These are stories all over the country. Now, you're the first person I ever heard who put this one by the prison. I've heard other locations, all of which incidentally are on top of a hill. If you don't know your car is going to roll downhill, I can't help you."

"So that's just a, what, a urban legend?"

"Yeah. It is."

"Hunh," he said, and left, pondering that.

I turned back to my computer and checked my e-mails. Nine times out of ten there's bad news, or some crap I gotta deal with. But this one was good. This one was from Laura.

We were on for the investigation at the Express.

On Friday morning, I put Paul on the bus to school. Then I went home; it was just me, the dog, and the hamster. I drank some more coffee, wrote an article, and then biked down to the grocery store and bought a box of cookies and a large pack of paper towels. I withdrew forty dollars from the register, asking for it in fives.

Then I biked down to the nonprofit I volunteer with, checked in, and dropped the paper towels and cookies on the table. Julie let me in.

"How's it going?" she asked.

"Got my tour tonight," I said. "I needed some starting change, so I thought I'd treat you guys to cookies. And I  know you always need cleaning products, so I'm donating it. I made the grocery give me all fives."

She handed me a five-dollar bill. "I'm not sure I can make it for the tour, but let me donate to her."

"Thanks. You're the first."

Lacey came into the break room. "Hi, Lou," she said. "How's everything?"

"So far, so good. How about you?"

She grinned. "Hope I can make it for the tour! How's that coming?"

"Little nervous," I admitted. "I'm hoping for a crowd. Ellie deserves this; her family needs the money."

"You'll do fine. You always do."

It's actually kind of nice to do a tour within walking distance of my house. Paul and I walked down the street before it began, as the sun was going down. He peered ahead down the street, and reported,"There's already people there."

"Good," I said. "I've been stressing about the weather all week, but it ended up being nice out. Now all I need to worry about is the crowd."

There were already several people waiting. I collected five dollars from each---Some people overdonated, giving more money than required for Ellie. Chris and his wife Kate were there, and Lacey made it with her son. Laura was there. As eight PM arrived, I saw Ellie in a wheelchair, pushed by Erin as they came down the street.

I activated my speaker system---It's a nice little speaker that clips on my belt, given to me by the Jersey Shore Historical Society a couple of years back. It had been a while since I'd had the chance to use it.

"Here's the guest of honor!" I said. "Ellie, good to see you." I turned to face the crowd, spread out along the sidewalk. Had to be about thirty people. "I'd like to thank you all for coming and supporting this family. It's a good night to take a walk and hear some ghost stories, so let's get started. Our first stop used to be a dairy, but before that, a family lived here, and their daughter died of diphtheria at age fourteen. Her name was Ruth, and she is still believed to be haunting the house...."

We got to the Express at seven, and Laura let us in the front door. I'd been there plenty of times, but never at night. Like most places, it looked a little different in the dark.

"Thanks for coming," she said. 

"Hey, thanks for having us."
"Do you need some sort of headquarters, or...."

"Place to drop our stuff, sure," I said. 

"You can use my desk."

We walked up the stairs to the office. The Express has a LOT of stairs. Up in the newsroom, we dropped our stuff. I dug out my tac vest and put it on.

"Do you guys have some kind of system?" Laura was snapping photos with her elaborate camera.

"More or less. We're going to go around and take some photos, get some readings. That's what we do first. Then we'll sit down and turn on the recorders, do an EVP session. Are there any hotspots in here? Places where you get a lot of activity?"

"The publisher's office," Laura said immediately,"And the conference room. Sometimes at night I hear typing from back there when I'm alone."

"I'm going to start with my recorder now," said Millie, sitting down at one of the desks.

"Good idea."

Millie began the continuous recording while Tami and I circulated and got some photos. I said,"Getting some weirdly high EMF readings on this window back here. Is there a power line outside?"

"I don't think so," said Laura. "No wiring back there, either."

"It's odd. This place has been maintained---Even at your outlets, I'm not getting a lot of EMF bleed."

I saw Tami snap a photo over her shoulder, casually, as if trying not to attract attention. Very cool move.

"Let's try the conference room," I said.

We went and sat down around the table. Millie set her EMF detector down, and I set down both of mine and turned on the recorder. "Seven-thirty PM on September 18th. Lock Haven Express, second floor, conference room. Lou."

"Millie."

"Tami."

"Laura."

"Is there anyone here?" I asked.

"Did you work here?" Laura asked. A moment later, she said,"We think it might be Rebecca Gross. She ran this place for decades."

"It would be in character for her to still be working," I said. "She died in, what, ninety-nine?"

"Ninety-eight," said Laura.

I stood up and walked around the room, taking a few readings. I walked out into the press room, and looked at the bulletin board.

"Hey, Laura," I said,"You guys got a sticker here with the twenty-four hour phone number of the Pennsylvania UFO Center. Got anything you want to tell me?"

"We do?!" Laura came out and looked. "I didn't even know that was there. This building is full of surprises."

"Getting a reading on my EMF detector," Millie said.

I looked down. Her EMF meter was spiking to orange as we talked. I said,"Is that someone? Rebecca? Do you want to communicate with us?"

A moment later, mine started doing the same thing. My all-in-one stayed steady, with no jumps or temperature fluctations.

I circled the room, snapping photos. I said,"Did you hear a clicking....?"

"I heard it," said Tami. "In that corner."

"Yeah." I got more photos.

"That's about where Rebecca Gross had her typewriter," said Laura. "That wall wasn't here then; it was added later."

The EMF meters spiked again, the lights running to orange. I said,"This is great. Laura, you'll never see something like this on the TV shows, but this is a really good night."

I handed Erin the envelope. "Here you go," I said. "Three hundred and fifty-five dollars. Use it however you like."
She hugged me, then hugged Paul. "Thank you both so much."
"How's everything going?" I asked.

"It's good," said Ellie. "I have to go all the way to Danville for radiation five days a week, but the surgery got all the tumor. So it's good."

I smiled. "I'm glad. Let me know if we can do anything else. We'll get out of your hair."

Paul and I walked outside, onto the street. As we walked down the street in the dark, he said,"That made them happy."

"Yeah," I said. "We made them very happy. We used our skills to help them a lot, which is good. And it's the kind of thing I want you learning as you grow up."

As we walked down the street, Paul's little hand slipped into mine. "I love you, Daddy," he said.

I smiled. "I love you, too, pal."

#100: Sea Change: One Guy Is An Island

I was just back from camp when I got a message about the paranormal. It happens.

I almost ignored it, then I read it over again. I walked into the other room, where my wife was watching TV.

"What do you think about a trip to Tionesta?"

"Didn't we just get back from a trip?"

"Yeah, but there's a program for at-risk kids out there that sent me a message. They have this annual event about the paranormal, and they just lost a guest speaker. They asked if I could fill in. It looks really cool; it's on an island in the Allegheny River. And it's in the PA Wilds, so I can get an article out of it, too."

"When is it?"

"Next Sunday," I said. "Day after I'm booked to give that talk at Hyner Run."

"Okay," said Michelle. "Anything cool out there to check out?"

"I don't know," I said. "But I'll find out."

The monthly meeting was me, Heather, and Ashlin. The others hadn't been able to make it. We sat in Heather's house, with her giant dog checking in on us periodically.

"It's been slow lately," commented Ashlin. "What can we do to drum up a little business?"

"You know," I said,"I think we all need something. Millie's husband died, Heather's grandfather died....I'm still recovering a bit....I think we need some time together. Every time I write something about the Pine-Loganton Road, the most haunted road in Clinton County, we get a lot of attention online. Maybe we need to investigate the PIne-Loganton Road."

"What's out there?" asked Heather.

"Well, there's a old legend of a murdered servant girl who appears in the form of a dancing cupboard. There's Bigfoot sightings. And I been working on water monsters all summer....There's a story near Sulphur Spring, where there's a horned serpent caused by a comet."

"That's a water monster?" asked Ashlin.

"If you squint."

"This sounds good," said Heather. "You know I'm in."

You'd think it might be unusual to have dinner in a haunted house, something that only happens in the movies. But my family does it every Friday. Tif, Biz, Paul, Michelle, and I sat around the table.

"I hate to eat and run," I said,"But as soon as I do the dishes, I gotta get out with the team. We're going to investigate the Pine-Loganton Road, the most haunted road in Clinton County."

"What time will you be home?" asked Paul.

"Probably around nine. Don't forget, little man, we're going to Hyner tomorrow night for my speech. And I may look into the Susquehanna Seal while we're there. And then on Sunday, we're going to Tionesta."

"What's in Tionesta?" Tif asked.

"I'll be speaking at a program for at-risk kids," I said. "Makes me feel good to use my paranormal experience to help out a little. We'll be on an island, with a lighthouse, and get this, the local library has a small cemetery right there on the property. It's one of those situations where the land was donated, but it already had the cemetery, so they agreed not to disturb it."

"Cool."

"I've had a song in my head all week," said Biz, who often comes up with these announcements out of left field. "Total Eclipse of the Heart."

"At least it's a good song," I commented.

Biz sang softly,"Turn around...."

Tif joined in. "Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round...."

"Turn around...."

"Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears...."

They both sang together: "Turn around, bright eyes...."

And that was when I joined in. "And I need you now tonight....And I need you more than ever....Forever's gonna start tonight! Forever's gonna start tonight...."

We all sang together. Paul, who didn't know the lyrics, smiled and just loved it.

"Once upon a time I was falling in love....Now I'm only falling apart....Nothing I can say....A total eclipse of the heart."

I sat in Heather's SUV next to her as she drove down the Pine-Loganton Road. Heather's hair was dyed bright blue. I was wearing my LHPS uniform and my classic tac vest. In the back sat Millie and Tami, our new member.

"I couldn't get the right coordinates for the dancing cupboard spot, so I had to figure it out more or less by hand," I said. "Should be up about here, Heather."

Heather pulled over, and we got out of the vehicle. I walked around to help Millie get out. I've known her a long time, and sometimes it surprises me that she's aged. I'm almost the age she was when we met.

"Thanks," she said as I helped her out.

"After all these years," I said,"I finally get to hold your hand."

She laughed. We fanned out along the road and began taking readings with our equipment. I got out my laser thermometer.

"Turning on recorder," said Heather. "We're along the Pine-Loganton Road, looking into stories of the dancing cupboard. Is there anyone here? Why take the form of a cupboard?"

"I've always wondered that," I said.

I walked around on the road, taking readings with my thermometer. Heather glanced over, and said,"Cool."

"New laser thermometer," I said. The new one was purple. "I admit I ordered it just for the color. It's my favorite. While I was at it, I got an all-in-one EMF detector---Three different settings, some of which I'm still figuring out, plus a thermometer and a flashlight. Saves some weight when I'm packing stuff."

"So where can we get these?" asked Tami.

"I'll send everyone the link. Amazon suggests this stuff to me now." I looked down at my thermometer.  "What the hell?"

Tami glanced over. "Something?"

"Yeah, maybe. It's late August, and it's like ninety degrees out here. So why the hell am I getting a reading of twenty-six?"

"Is it Fahrenheit?" asked Millie.

"Yeah, I always leave it set to Fahrenheit because it's easier to understand." I showed Tami the screen. "Just for a minute, I got a serious drop. Could be our first ghost of the night."

Fifteen minutes later, we pulled up on another corner and got out. Heather looked over the foliage and commented,"Look, mint. Wild grapes, raspberries...."

"If Bigfoot wanted to eat, it would be a good place," I said.

We hiked back into the woods a bit. There was a thin trail that led back. I spotted a cluster of whitish hair on the ground, and knelt down beside it. "Hair," I said.

"Probably deer," commented Heather. 

"Probably," I said. "But I'm taking a sample. I haven't given up hope of a blonde Bigfoot."

Heather laughed. "I'm going to start keeping a journal of your quotes. I haven't given up hope of a blonde Bigfoot is a good one."

We walked back through the woods. I said,"Don't wanna leave Millie alone in the car too long. We'd better get back, and check on the Sulphur Serpent."

We rode down to Loganton, and I pointed. "The pavilion over there---That's Sulphur Spring. There's a legend there of a Native American guy who was killed, and a comet turned him into a serpent monster and gave the water a heavy Sulphur flavor."

'What?" asked Millie.

"Yeah, it doesn't make any more sense when you read it," I said. "Some of the tribes believed that drinking from the spring had healing powers."

"How can you get it down with the Sulphur?" asked Millie.

"I'll never know. I couldn't do it. Specifically, they believed it could cure a hangover, and it's too bad I can't drink it, as I was up half the night and spent about $3.50 getting one."

We stopped and got out of the car. Tami and Heather headed immediately for the footbridge, and I said,"Be right with you. I'm gonna test this water. Keep an eye out for serpents."

I walked over to the spring, getting out my litmus paper. I knelt down by the spring, under the pavilion. I could smell the water from where I was already.

"Sulphur," I said softly.

I held the litmus paper under the water for a moment, then pulled it back. It had turned a light green, which I compared to the little chart that came with the kit. Then, sliding the whole thing back into my pocket, I walked across the bridge to Heather and Tami.

"Water's a little alkaline," I said. "Nothing too dangerous."

"No serpents?" Tami asked.

I grinned at her. "Not yet."

Heather said,"Look at those divots in the rock down there. I wonder what those are."

"From here, they look manmade," I said. I considered a moment---There'd been a time I'd have climbed right down the bank, and I decided I wanted to be like that again. "Let's check."

I scrambled down the bank and stepped over the water on the rocks. Heather landed nimbly behind me---I'd known she would. "If you fall in, I'm not fishing you out," she said.

"Think I'll be okay."

We knelt down by the dents in the rock. I said,"These look Native American to me. Some sort of cooking thing, maybe? Put your water in there to heat it up. They did a lot of that."
"Yeah, this didn't happen naturally," said Heather, running her fingers in one.

"Confirms that the Native Americans were here," I said. "All points to the legend."

We looked out at the sunset in the SUV, on the way home. Heather said,"I love this area."

"Me, too," agreed Tami. "I'm glad I moved here. This is a great place."

"I needed this tonight," I said. "I'm glad we got the chance to get together and do this, guys. I really needed this."

I sat on the bench beside my wife, watching Paul in the pool at Hyner Run. At eight, Paul is more confident in the water than I've ever been, which continually fascinates me. He was throwing pool toys into the water, letting them sink, and then diving down to retrieve them. And then throwing them in to start all over again.

I stood up. "I'm gonna go for a walk before my speech," I said.

"Have fun investigating your monster," said Michelle.

"What monster?"

"Whichever. Whatever monster you're sneaking off to find."

"You're so suspicious," I said, and then walked off to look for the Susquehanna Seal.

We were at Hyner Run, which flowed into the Susquehanna. I was even wearing my Susquehanna Seal shirt on it, showing the monster that had often been sighted in these waters. Earlier in the summer, I'd come up with the theory that it was a rogue Hynerpeton, a prehistoric creature that had been discovered only in Clinton County. I'd started off the pandemic investigating the Susquehanna Seal, and now here I was doing it again.

I felt good. I was in a good mood, and some of the self-improvement I'd tried to work on over the summer seemed to be taking effect. I could feel myself taking up my old rhythms, feeling more like the old me before COVID knocked out a lot of my confidence. I was getting some of that back now, and it was a good thing.

I got to the peaceful, grassy spot down near the bridge, and I dropped my pack to the grass. Walking down to the run, I tested the water with litmus paper---I knew it could support life, as I could see bugs and fish in the water, but you gotta follow procedure. It was a perfect seven, exactly the right pH.

I looked at some of the plants. With something prehistoric, you reach what I call the Population Problem---If there are sightings over a hundred years, you're obviously not looking at one creature, but a family of them. If I was considering a leftover prehistoric Hynerpeton, it had to eat. And the plants had all changed, since those days. I knew of only one tree, the gingko, that was still around from that long ago.

I looked at the bugs, skirting across the top of the water.

What if it was a carnivore?

Now, that was an interesting thought. Thought all the plants had changed in the past million years or so, insects and fish hadn't much, at least not in terms of nutritional value. A carnivore could have lived in these waters that long without having to evolve much, diet-wise.

I walked back up the path. As I walked, I saw a DCNR vehicle rolling down toward me. I raised a hand and waved, and an arm waved back from the window. He pulled up beside me, and it was my friend Ian, who booked me for a speech every year.

"How you doing, Lou?" he asked.

"I'm good, Ian," I said truthfully. "How about you?"

"Yeah, I'm good," he said. "Thanks for coming tonight."

"Glad to do it," I said. "Thanks for inviting me."

"You finding everything allright?"

I nodded.

"Oh, yeah," I said. "I'm finding some interesting stuff."

That night, everyone was in bed. Michelle, Paul, Rosie. This left me up with Emily, our new hamster, and probably Ida, the ghost in the house. I sat in the kitchen with my laptop.

"Hi, Ida," I said. "How you doing?" Some nights I do this, just talk to Ida with everyone else asleep. "It's your anniversary, isn't it? A hundred and seventeen years since the night you died. I'm doing a little research, if you want to stick around."

I got online, and searched for Hynerpetons.

Among all the pictures and other information, I found an article that said, based on their jaws, they were carnivorous. They lived on bugs and small fish.

"Well, Ida," I said,"Looks like my theory is good."

The borough of Tionesta reminds me a lot of Renovo, back in Clinton County. As we pulled into town mid-afternoon in the Prius, I was getting serious Renovo vibes.

"Right here, right here," I said excitedly. "Stop at the local library!"

Michelle pulled the car in. "Says it's closed."

"It is closed. But they have a cemetery, and I gotta check it out."

I climbed out of the car. I had my deluxe tactical vest, the one with all the patches and pockets. I took a few readings with the thermometer, and clicked some photos. 

Someone came up the slope behind me. Paul.

"Check it out, little man," I said. "I wish our library had a cemetery."

"It's cool," Paul agreed.

"And this is only the beginning of today," I said. "We're gonna go out on the island so I can make my speech."

"Cameron doesn't know how to ghost hunt," he said. "When I was playing with his the other day, he had an app. I told him they're all fake, and he wanted to know why I think everything's fake, and I told him I know, cause my dad's a ghost hunter."

"Proud of you, little man."

"When I'm older," Paul asked,"Can I take over your team?"

I smiled.

"Yes," I said. "Yes, you can."

The island was really cool. There's no other way to say it---The island was cool. We drove in on the small bridge, and parked by the building. We walked around a few minutes, looking at the lighthouse standing over everything, and the park that even had a model of the Statue of Liberty in it. I'd fallen in love with Tionesta immediately upon arriving, and this just made it even better.

"Is that a hot dog stand?" asked Paul.

"You hungry? Come on, let's get you a hot dog."

We bought Paul a hot dog, and then I found my contact person at the front of the building. I recognized her in a moment, and said,"Roni? Hi, nice to meet you!"
"Thank you for coming," she said. "We have a table set up for you."

I brought in my equipment and set it on the table. I had laser thermometers, EMF detectors, recorders, and cameras along with the LHPS business cards. My vest was in the center.

The guy currently speaking was going on about demons and werewolves. Michelle leaned over and whispered,"Oh, they're gonna just love you."

"Yeah. I was thinking that."

A kid came up to the table, looking things over. He asked,"What's this?"

"Night vision binoculars. If you press the button on top, a laser lights you up."

"Cool. This is awesome." Pointing at the tactical vest.

"Yeah, man," said another kid. "That's really cool."

I grinned. "Looks pretty bad-ass while I'm investigating."

Roni went up and took the microphone. "If everyone could please take their seats," she said,"Our next speaker came all the way from Lock Haven to be here today. I'll let him come up and introduce himself, and please give him your attention. Lou?"

I walked up to the front of the room. I was wearing my shirt with the ghost silhouette symbol on it. I stood in front of the table and set down a few pieces of my equipment.

Paul came up and sat down in the front row.

I smiled at the audience.

"Hi, everyone, and thanks for having me," I said. "I appreciate your being here today. My name is Lou, and I'm a member of the Lock Haven Paranormal Seekers. We do scientific, measurable investigations of our local places. Let me say, I am loving Tionesta! I've never been here before, but I love your community. This place is great."

I took a deep breath, and then grinned.

"Now," I said,"Let's talk about the paranormal."

And it ended with bedtime....As most things do.

Night had fallen. I walked along the sidewalk with Rosie, and then entered the house. I let her off the leash, and she jetted for the stairs. I followed along.

Paul was already in bed, under the covers. I gave him his goodnight kiss, and said,"Goodnight, little man. I'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Daddy," Paul said, already preparing to not fall asleep until after eleven.

I stopped at his door and turned around. He said,"What?"

"What's your favorite thing we investigate?"

He thought it over. "Ghosts. Also Bigfoot. And cryptids. Why?"

I smiled. 

"Just wondered, little guy. Goodnight."

#99: Sea Change: A River Runs Near It

"The Susquehanna River," I said,"Is not supposed to flow that way."

Tif and Michelle looked up from the table. Paul got up to join me at the restaurant window. I said,"Look at that! This is one hell of a thunderstorm. The wind is blowing the river in a way it's not supposed to go---In this area, the Susquehanna runs south, but the river's actually blowing it east toward us."

"I hope we can get to camp," said Tif.

"We'll manage," I said. "I'm glad we're in here for the duration, though."

"Dad!" said Paul. "I think I see Ray!"

"You mean Raystown Ray?"

"Yeah!" 

"Wrong county, little guy. We're after the Susquehanna Mystery Thing this trip." I glanced back out, where the rain was beating hard against the window. "This is a great storm! Best day all summer!"

"Well, fuck."

I removed the sopping wet sleeping bag from the car and flung it over the porch railing to dry. Most of our stuff had come through unscathed. Packing my shirts for the trip had involved two Loch Ness Monsters, two Snallygasters, a Bigfoot, and a ghost. Tif came out of the cabin door and sat down on the bench. I sat down near her.

"Stuff got goddamn soaked on the roof of the car," I said. "We'll try to have it dry by morning. In the meantime, I'm gonna look into the Susquehanna Mystery Thing."

"Water monster?"

"Yeah, it's been sighted in this part of the Susquehanna. A reporter wrote a whole piece about it, some big thing swimming in the water. I checked it out once before from the west side of the river, when we were in Lewisburg. A drunk guy drank my water sample. Now I'm gonna try it from here." I lit a cigar. "Been using this summer to try and put myself back together."

"I wasn't aware you were falling apart."

"COVID did a number on my head. I'm not what I once was. Been too depressed to hunt ghosts; not enjoying my job."
"What else would you do?"

"You'll notice I'm still there."

"You hide this well. You've been a little irritable, but I had no idea it was this bad."

"I'm working on it," I said. "Trying to come back."

I walked down along Chillesquaque Creek, which feeds into the Susquehanna. I was wearing my travel outfit: Black fishing vest, fingerless gloves with skulls on them. I had a Loch Ness Monster pin on the vest, and my green cryptozoology kit slung over one shoulder. I stopped and took a water sample, securing it in my pocket. 

As I walked back up to the camp, a golf cart pulled up. There was an older couple in it. "Going fishing?" the man asked.

"Something like that," I said.

The woman looked me over. "You're one of them investigators, ain'tcha? My son is really into that."

"I am," I said. "I'm looking into reports of a water creature."

I walked up to the pavilion and dropped about $3.50 on a couple of sodas. The employee, a woman with a badge that said,"Ranger Kelly," asked,"Enjoying your trip?"

"So far. Let me ask you a weird question."

"Oh, there's no such thing as weird questions," she said. 

"You'd be surprised. Do you know of any good ghost stories out here? Cryptids, that sort of thing?"

She smiled. "I'm not from here. They're short-staffed, so they brought me up from Florida. But there's a guy who works here who's really into that stuff. He's away at a funeral right now, but I'll call him and ask. He'd love to tell you some stories."

"Thanks. I appreciate that."

I walked down the path toward the pool, which was where Paul was spending most of his time. There was a camper along the path in Site 75, where the owner was outside working at a table. The camper had an American flag in Christmas lights on it, some conservative-looking stickers, and a sticker that said,"I party with Sasquatch." That caught my attention, and I stopped and looked him over.

Heavyset guy. About my age. Wearing a camouflage hat, black shirt, and cargo shorts. He was smoking a cigar. He had an array of dart guns and cameras set out on the table in front of him, and, I swear, a goddamn Alfa Romeo parked in front of the trailer.

He looked up and saw me. I glared at him. He glared at me. I held up two fingers pointed at my own eyes, then turned them around and pointed them at him.

I turned and walked up to the pool, where Paul was splashing around under the supervision of Michelle and Tif.

"Hi, guys." I sat down.

"I am exhausted," said Tif. "I couldn't get any sleep last night, because I can't sleep unless I'm sitting up. Maybe I'll sleep in the car tonight."

"That could get really hot," I said. "And kind of damp---The car's still drying out from the thunderstorm. I'll pile some sleeping bags up for you, and see if that helps."

"We'll try it."

"There's another paranormal investigator in camp," I said.

"Did you talk to him?" Michelle asked.

"No."

"Isn't there some kind of code?"

"Fuck him, he looks like a Trumper redneck. I got enough friends in the business---Kevin, Norman....He was over there smoking a cigar, like he's all special."

"Dad," said Tif. "Let it go."

"Never. He's wearing a leaf camouflage hat, so that makes me automatically smarter. He probably believes in gravity hills and stuff. I'm gonna beat him to the Susquehanna Mystery Thing. I can take him."
"Of course you can," said Tif. "How many multi-tools do you have on yourself right now?"

"Does my Swiss Army Knife count?"

"Yes."
"Six."
"Is that counting the bottle opener on your belt buckle?"

"....Seven."

"You think he has that many?"

"Sitting there with his dart guns," I said. "Shady bastard. I can take him."

"Hey, Pipper," I said,"Want to help me do the litmus test?"

Paul came out from the cabin's back bedroom. "Sure," he said.

I reached into my vest pocket and pulled out the water sample and the litmus paper. I passed them to him---At eight years old, the kid knows what to do. He dipped the paper into the water, and compared it to the colors on the small chart on the package.

"Looks like an eight," he said.

"A little high, but still able to support life," I said.

He sat down on his bed. "I want my puppy," he said.

I hugged him. "I miss Rosie, too. But she's having fun---She's in the kennel with other dogs, and having her own little adventure. We'll see her in a few days. In the meantime, let's have fun."

I walked along the river, looking for signs of water monsters. You know, that common camp activity. It had gotten really hot out, and I'd stopped to unzip the vent flap on the back of my vest. It folded into a small pocket on the bottom, leaving the back more ventilated mesh.

I walked up the hill a little bit and hit the overpass. Then I stopped. Someone was standing there, looking out over the river.

It was him.

He had his dart gun on the guardrail, and a camera with a tripod set up and aimed out over the river. A pair of very expensive-looking binoculars hung around his neck.

We stopped and stared at each other from a distance. Cue the theme to The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly.

I glared at him. He glared back.

My eyes narrowed. 

He sneered.

We could have probably done that all day, but then there was a splash up the river.

We both turned to look. Something big was up there, splashing around.

Simultaneously, we bolted.

I turned and ran for the best angle. He ran for his camera. Equipment matters, but there's a lot to be said for being mobile---Everything I needed was tucked into the pockets of my vest. I ran down the overpass, vaulting over the guardrail and into the grass. He grabbed the camera and reversed, following me.

I kicked a branch into the way as I ran. He leaped over it and kept coming. I got through the trees and down toward the river. I was in better shape---He was starting to breathe hard, and his camera slipped from his hands and hit the mud.

I had my camera out and slid the strap around my wrist---I'd done this so many times I didn't even need to think about it. Clumsy procedure there, guy. I stopped where there was something large in the water, splashing away from me and headed upstream. I raised my camera and snapped a photo.

Got it.

He was still trying to get into position as I walked away. Score one for the good guys.

Immediately upon waking up, Paul wanted to go to the pool. Michelle took him up, and Tif took a book and went out to read. I made myself a cup of coffee with one of the single bags we'd bought, and drank it on the porch for a while. I studied the map of camp, looking for places to stake out. After I was done, I walked up and joined them.

"Still can't sleep, Dad," said Tif. "The sleeping bags fell off the bed, and so did I."

"What would help?" I asked.

"If I could sit up against something solid," she said. "It's how I do it at home."

"Hmm."

I sat for a while and looked out over the pool area. I could pick out Paul, splashing down the slide with a bunch of other kids he'd just met that day. There were parents throughout the area, some sitting in the chairs or lounge chairs, of which there were maybe a hundred. Some of them had alcohol, which even I can't get into at ten-thirty in the morning. 

I looked at one of the lounge chairs.

"Be right back," I said.

I walked toward the pavilion. A couple on the way, stopped, looking at me. "Are you Lou?" the woman asked.

I was fifty miles from home.

"Yeah, that's me," I said.

"I read a lot of your articles."

"Thank you. I hope you're enjoying them."

I found Ranger Kelly working the register in the snack bar. She smiled when she saw me. "I called Bert," she said. "I left him a message asking about ghosts."

"Thanks. I have another weird question. My daughter is handicapped, and has trouble sleeping if she's not sitting up. After hours, would it be possible to borrow one of the adult lounge chairs for her to sleep in?"

"Oh, I don't see why not," she said. "I'll call maintenance."

Five minutes later, a maintenance guy arrived and I repeated the question to him.

"I'll go one better," he said. "We have the old chairs that we're not using anymore up at the warehouse. I can get you one of those right now."

"That'd be great," I said. "Thanks."

Tif lowered herself carefully into the pool chair, testing it out. After fidgeting around for a while, she smiled. "I think this might work, Dad."

"I was hoping," I said. "Better than sleeping in the car. They were really nice about bringing it down for us."

There was a knock at the door. Paul and I went to answer it. Ranger Kelly stood on the porch.

"Just the guy I wanted to see," she said. "Is the lounge chair okay?"

"It looks like it's going to work," I said. "Thanks so much!"

"Of course, of course," she said. "I spoke to Bert on the phone. He's really into the ghost stories, and he was all excited." She handed me a slip of paper. "The Rishel Covered Bridge, near here, is haunted by some children who died there. He says if you cover your car hood with talcum powder, you can see the handprints of children who push it away."

I smiled. I said,"That's great. Thanks."

Paul said,"But Daddy, isn't that---"

"Sssh. Ranger Kelly, I appreciate this. You know, you should also share this with the guy in Site 75. He's into this stuff, as well."

"Will do!"

We walked back inside. Tif asked,"Who was that?"

"Ranger Kelly tracked down a ghost story for me involving a bunch of dead kids and a talcum powdered car."

"That's a gravity hill," she said. "You hate those."

"Yeah," I said. "But with any luck, she'll pass it on to the other guy, and he'll waste his time checking it out while I discover a river monster."

Tif and I are always the last ones awake on these family trips. Michelle generally can't wait until bedtime, and Paul wears himself out enough that he passes out immediately. So we wound up on the porch together, talking for a while after dark.

"I figure I'm gonna go take a walk before bed," I said. "Stake out the river and see about the monster. I'll head down to the overpass."

"What is it with cryptids and overpasses?" Tif asked.

"I don't know, cryptids love overpasses. The Virginia Bunnyman won't stray more than fifteen feet from an overpass."

"The Virginia Bunn---You know what, never mind. Have fun."

I walked down the road, along the creek. The sun had set, and it was cooling off a bit. 

An Alfa Romeo with conservative stickers rode past me and turned right, heading for the covered bridge. I smiled.

I got to the overpass, walked down to the bank, and sat down. I lit a cigar. I wouldn't do that if I were staking out the place for, say, Bigfoot, but it was unlikely that a water monster was going to smell the tobacco and get suspicious. And I waited.

Over the summer, I'd uncovered a hoax and brushed up on my ghost hunting. I'd spent time with Paul, and made a few plans. Working on myself.

COVID had knocked a lot of the confidence out of me, but I could come back from that. Over two years of worry had taken a toll, and I knew I wasn't the only one. What I needed to do was find the joy in life again.

Down below, in the water, there was a sound. I looked down with the night-vision binoculars. A catfish was down there---I could see it in the green laser light. It looked at least three feet long.

If I didn't have binoculars made specifically for darkness, all I'd be seeing was something big, slithering through the water. The Susquehanna Mystery Thing could just be a series of giant-sized catfish.

I smiled.

Things were looking up.

 We walked into the small office, where a woman was waiting at the desk. Another woman went into the back and came out with our small black dog. Paul and the dog launched themselves at one another.

"Rosie!"

Paul hugged her. Rosie bounced around, taking turns jumping on all of us and managing to get a few good licks on Paul's face. I smiled.

"She's coming home now, buddy. You get to sleep with Rosie tonight."

Paul hugged his dog.

"I love you, Rosie," he said. "I'll never leave you again."

Sea Change: Killing Time

I walked through a giant heart, someplace in the left ventricle. Paul was ahead of me, wearing his Harry Potter robe and carrying a wand. We walked through the heart and downward, until finally we came out in the Franklin Institute in Philadelphia, where Michelle was waiting for us.

"The giant heart is exactly the way I remember it as a kid," I said. "I used to come here on field trips a lot. We lived just an hour north of here."

"Well, it was a good idea to come for the Harry Potter exhibition," said Michelle,"And then stay for the rest of the museum."

"Can I go in the heart again?" asked Paul.

"No reason why not," I said. Paul ran into the giant heart, and I sat down on the bench with Michelle.

"See that plastic lung over there?" I said. "I showed that to my dad when I was a kid, in an effort to get him to quit smoking."
"Did it work?" she asked.

"Yeah. Just forty years later, he quit."

She nodded. "I booked a hotel in Allentown overnight. We can sleep there and head back to Lock Haven in the morning."

"That'll be nice," I said. "I have a class on water monsters to teach at work, so I'll be needing to get back. I'm still checking into the Susquehanna Seal, so I'm hoping to find some sort of results to publicize."

"Still doing the water monsters?"

"Still working on it. It's good practice for me, trying to get back to what I once was. When I was a kid, I built a sea monster trap in my dad's pond. It was the only body of water I really had access to. It's probably still sunk to the bottom someplace."

"Anything like that near the hotel?" Michelle asked.

"There was a UFO sighting there," I said. "Maybe I'll check into that. But if I have to spend the night just hanging around the hotel room, I'm capable of that."

"No you're not."

"Usually something turns up to kill a little time."

Paul exited the heart, smiling. "Can we go back to the brain now?"

I looked out the car window as we rode over the Schuylkill River bridge. The river, coming from the north, was below us as we rode out of Philadelphia.

"I spotted a water monster down in this area as a kid," I said.

"Cool," said Paul, who was busy eating some of the candy from the gift shop. Michelle had spent considerable in the gift shop, and Paul had, at my estimate, at least $3.50 worth of candy in his mouth at that moment.

 "My grandfather had a farm in Montgomery County, and I used to spend a lot of time there at the Schuylkill River," I said. "When I was, oh, eleven maybe, I saw something in the water one summer. Tried to get pictures with my Polaroid. I always pictured it as a plesiosaur or something like the Loch Ness Monster, but it could have just been an especially big catfish, or a loon, or something."

"What's a loon?" asked Paul.

"A really big water bird. Though it's worth noting that there are some huge fish in the water, and some of the people in Philadelphia believe there's monster creatures. Probably because of the constant dumping of murder victims into the Schuylkill. I'd love to make another round, and see if I can investigate it."

"Maybe we'll do that sometime," said Michelle.

"Can I come?" asked Paul.

"Of course you can," I said. "I need you."

I watched Paul splash around in the hotel pool, cheerfully diving under and coming up for air. "Speaking of water monsters," I said.

"What are we going to do about dinner?" Michelle asked me.

I shrugged. "Gotta be someplace around we can eat. I'll ask at the desk, I suppose."

"You want to go ask now? While Paul is swimming?"

"Might as well," I said. "I wanted to explore anyway."

The woman working the front desk was dark-haired, with glasses, wearing entirely black clothing. I had the feeling that she might be a good person to ask about the local haunted scene; she had the look. I waited until someone else had checked in, and then stopped at the counter.

"Hi, checking in?" she asked.

"No, we're already in room three-twelve," I said. "Just had a couple of questions. How are you doing?"

"Having a rough day," she admitted.

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said. "I work with the public, too. I get it. Is there anyplace around that we can get something to eat?"
"P.J. Whelihan's," she said. "It's right up the street, two lights and then turn left. It's really good."

"Thank you. This next one is gonna sound kind of weird....Are there any good ghost stories around here?"

She smiled and lit up. "Right here!" she said.

"Here in this hotel?"

"Oh, yes," she said. "We have stuff happen all the time."

"This makes you my best friend in Lehigh County," I said. I handed her my card. "I'm a writer and paranormal investigator. I'd like to hear more about this."

"Oh, really? That's awesome! Sure! Well, the whole hotel is haunted. We have stuff happen a lot. Just the other night, I heard footsteps here in the lobby---They walked right up to the desk, but there was nobody here. We've had people die in here. One guy got shot right where you're standing, and we get ODs in here all the time."
Most of the time, hotel staff aren't as open about that sort of thing. I was intrigued, though I decided not to share the part about the ODs with Paul. 

"You mind if I do a little investigating?"

"Nope, that'd be great!"

"Okay, cool. Mind if I ask your name?"

"I'm Madison. I'm the manager here."
I shook her hand. "Hi, Madison. I'm Lou. So if you see me walking around down here later with my son, carrying around some equipment, don't be alarmed. We're just checking for dead people."

"That's so cool," she said.

After dinner, Paul and I wandered down to the lobby of the hotel. There was a very long back hallway I'd discovered that led down that way, making it easy to reach from our room.

"How come you get to wear the cool stuff?" Paul asked.

I looked down at myself. I was wearing my alien shirt, skull gloves, and the black fishing vest I used for traveling. "I packed my uniform," I said. "You want me to get you a travel model?"

"Yeah." He was wearing a set of peach-colored pajamas.

We walked into the lobby. Madison was there with another employee, a black woman. She took one look at us, and said,"Oh my god, are you the paranormal guys?"

"Yeah, that's us. We're going to do a little investigating. I'd planned to focus on cryptozoology this summer, but your ghosts are good practice, too."

"That is so cool," she said. "This place is so haunted. Stuff happens all the time. Do you guys have a YouTube channel?"

"No, but my team's got a Facebook page." I handed her the LHPS card.

"You have a little ghost on there! I love it!"

"We're going to be doing a few tests in here, but we won't be too obtrusive."

"Help yourself," she said.

I got out my new all-in-one EMF meter. It was around five inches long, with a small screen and a thick antenna on top. "This is my new piece," I said. "It measures both EMFs and temperature, plus it's got a flashlight built in. I'm testing it out tonight."

"That's pretty cool," she said. "You don't use a spirit box?"

"Not usually, but mainly that's because it interferes with my other equipment."

"Oh, I see."
Paul looked at the new piece. "Daddy, can I try it?"

I handed it to him. "Go get some readings."

"We have stuff happen all over this lobby," Madison told me. "One night the pinball machine came on all by itself."

"I'm going to get a few photos," I said.

The lobby was big and open. I walked through with my laser thermometer in one hand and my camera in the other, snapping photos. I got a slight temperature rise on the south side that turned out to be coming through the windows. Paul came out of the hallway with the all-in-one.

"Can I have the regular thermometer?" he asked.

"Sure. Let's trade. You want the wand, too?"

"Yeah."

I handed him the laser thermometer and the small, wand-style EMF detector. He walked over to the wall while I checked the middle of the lobby.

"Daddy." he said. The wand was beeping against three small mirrors that hung on the wall.

"Try the outlet nearby."

He moved the wand over to the outlet, and the beeping slowed. Back at the mirrors, it picked up again.

I glanced at Madison. "There's no reason for that," I said.

She raised her eyebrows.

"I'm also getting some high readings over here, in the center of the room," I said. "No reason for that, either. Normally you check to make sure you're not near any power lines, but there can't be any here. When I lower it to the floor, the readings drop off."

"So there might be something," Madison said.

"It's certainly possible."

Paul circled the room and came back around to me. "I think I saw something in the hall."

"You want to join me for an EVP session?"

"Yeah."

We sat on the lobby couches, and I turned on the digital recorder for a few minutes of sound recording. I'd taught Paul to d this when he was five, and he was getting pretty good at it. We went back and forth for a little while, firing off questions for the ghosts.

I clicked off the recorder. "Okay, little man. Having fun?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Madison over there mentioned to me that the pinball machine is haunted, too. I brought ten dollars in quarters for you to play with, so you want to try it out?"

He smiled. "Do you think the snack machine might be haunted, too? I want some Oreos."

"Come on. Let's get you Oreos, and then play pinball."

Ten PM. I was sitting in bed with a book, wearing my Lake Erie monster pajamas. Michelle was already asleep, and Paul was laying out pillows and blankets on the floor.

"You planning to sleep on the hotel floor?" I asked.

Paul nodded. "Yeah."

I let it go. I'd done dumber things at his age. "Thanks for helping out with the investigation tonight, little man."

"I had a fun day today, Daddy," he said.

I smiled.

"I'm glad," I said. "You lay down and get some sleep. We'll be heading home tomorrow."

Sea Change: Ray Of Hope

It began with coffee, as most things do.

I took a sip of black coffee and looked across the table at Chris. He and his wife Kate were in the coffee shop when I'd bumped into them, and I'd joined them for a few minutes of hanging out.

Chris had once been my intern, and had gone into a career similar to mine---Local tourism, history research, freelance writing. He asked,"Has Ian invited you to do a speech at Kettle Creek or Hyner this year?"

"We've discussed it," I said. "Don't have a date yet, but it's looking pretty good."

"Doing your tours this year?"
"Oh, yeah, I'll send you the flyer."

"What's the summer reading theme?" Chris asked.

"This year, it's oceanography," I said. "Not the easiest thing to plan around in central Pennsylvania, but I'm trying to make it work. Looking for programs that involve the ocean, or close to it."

"The Susquehanna Seal," said Chris.

"Funny you  should bring that up," I commented. "I usually tailor some investigations around the summer reading theme. Back in 2019, when it was space, Paul and I looked for UFOs all summer. Last year, with animals, we hunted cryptids. This year, we're looking at a summer of water monsters."

"You know a lot about water monsters, do you?"

"I know you're not supposed to feed them."

"I suppose that's a start. What else is  there, besides the Susquehanna Seal?"

"Bunch of water monsters around. The thing is, this kind of feels like....I don't know, closure, to me. I was about to go to New York and look into the Silver Lake Serpent when COVID all came down and the world changed, you know?"

"You were going all the way to New York to check out a water creature?"

"I was checking out the water creature to avoid spending too much time with Paul's Cub Scout Pack. There was one little guy, Alex, who drove me nuts. His mother runs the pack. One of these days, I'm going to hit Alex's mother. With Alex. They had the camping trip to Silver Lake planned."

"But then COVID...."

"Yeah," I said. "COVID came, and derailed everything. In fact, as best I can recall, I was working on the Susquehanna Seal the week before it all started. Since then, I've worked on a bunch of UFOs, dealt with three dog deaths, quit ghost hunting and gone back to it, changed my uniform twice, and had a summer full of cryptids. Seems to me like if I can spend the summer making progress on water monsters....Well, maybe I can get back some of the confidence I've lost."

I took the tongs and turned over the chicken, then closed the grill and sat down at the picnic table. Paul was messing around bringing everyone cups and plates for our family dinner outside. I picked up my can of beer---Can't grill without a can of beer---And took a drink.

"You want to go to Raystown sometime?" I asked Michelle.

"Okay," she said. "What's in Raystown?"

Tif grinned. "You're going after Raystown Ray," she said.

"I am,' I agreed.

"What sort of unknown creature is Raystown Ray?" Michelle asked.

"In Raystown, there's swimming and a playground for you and Paul. Water monster for me," I said. "I kinda tried to do a search for Pennsylvania water monsters, but it kept giving me my own articles. Really started pissing me off. So I decided to go for Raystown Ray, a vegetarian water monster in a manmade lake. When it comes to Pennsylvania lake monsters, Ray's kind of the boss fight."

"Is Ray the only one?" asked Tif.

"There are a few others. The Ogua, near Pittsburgh...."

"Didn't you investigate that one a couple of years ago?"

"Nah, that was South Bay Bessie, up in Erie. Not gotten to the Ogua yet. I've never investigated Raystown Ray, either, though I've always kind of wanted to."

"Well, the next day you're off, then," agreed Michelle.

"Is the food done?" Tif asked.

"Few more minutes," I said. "I might do a little prep work for Ray---Check out the Susquehanna Seal again or something. I've investigated the Susquehanna Seal before, but it's good to keep in practice."

I went to check on the food. Tif rolled over while I was flipping the chicken. "Gonna practice on the Susquehanna Seal?" she asked.

"I can use the workout. Last time I recall investigating a water monster was the Altamaha-Ha last summer. When I was a kid, the water cryptids were always my favorite. I chalked a Loch Ness Monster on the wall of my dad's garage. I was always out looking for a monster in the Schuylkill River near my grandfather's place."

"Was there one?"

"Well, hope dies hard. I only had access to just so many bodies of water as a kid."

"Think you'll find a water monster this summer?"

"We can hope. Looks like that's going to be my main summer activity."

"Gonna go out for a bit," I told Zach at the desk. "See if I can round up some prizes to raffle off for our Clinton Challenge."

"Okay," he said.

"We got people counting their reading hours every week, competing with Clinton, New York and Clinton, New Jersey to see who can read the most," I said. "Need some raffle prizes for this thing."

"Take your time," he said.

I went outside, got my bike, and rode downtown. I stopped and hit up a couple of businesses for gift cards, and then biked over the the Susquehanna River.

There were a couple of families at the public beach. I walked down the levee and scanned the shore, looking up and down the river. Doing this sort of research always makes people look at you funny, but I'd long since gotten over that. I watched the river for a while, and then walked down to get a water sample.

As I dipped a sample tube into the river, a little kid came up to me. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Getting a water sample to test," I said,

"What's your name?"

"My name is Lou."

I tested the water with my litmus paper, and it ranked in about a seven. Pretty much ideal for supporting aquatic life. I walked along the edge for a little, looking at the environment.

There were a couple of gingko trees growing on the shore. I had a thought, looking them over, and I walked back to my bike and rode off.

I walked into Tif's apartment after work. She was sitting at her desk. 

"I picked up the bed that was delivered," she said. "I tried to call you because the box fell in the doorway and blocked my way in, and I was trapped, but I figured it out."

"Well, I'm glad you're not trapped."

"What's up, Daddy?" she asked.

"I need to take a look at that Hynerpeton poster I gave you," I said. I walked into the bedroom and looked at the poster.

"Yeah, the Hynerpeton," said Tif. "Archaeologists discovered a prehistoric creature right here in Clinton County."

"They did." I examined the poster, which had labelled Hynerpetons and some of the foliage from the era. "I'm thinking about this, lately. There was a creature discovered here....And there were articles about a water monster in the river....."

"You think the Susquehanna Seal could be a leftover Hynerpeton?"

"It's a theory. Not sure it could survive the Pennsylvania winters---Hell, I have trouble surviving the Pennsylvania winters---But if the species was able to stay fed.....Look, this plant...Otzinachsonia Beerboweri. Those have to have been found locally; they're named after the river. The Native Americans used to call this whole valley Otzinachson. Did I ever tell you it meant 'Demon's den'? They believed this whole place was haunted."

"Well...."

"I know. But if there was one native plant they could eat, they might have evolved to eat others. They've had millions of years."

"They could survive the winters by burying themselves in the mud, like some frogs do."

"Could be. I need to work on that this summer, see if I can find any evidence for or against. We have a water monster and our own personal amphibian, and they could be connected."

Raystown Lake runs for twenty miles, and you can tell you're in the tourist zone before you ever get anywhere near the water. There's a million places selling supplies, firewood, camping spaces, and other things. We stopped at the visitor's center first, and went in to look around.

We immediately got sidetracked by the penny machine. After a couple of dollars, Paul and I ended up with a few flattened pennies with fish stamped on them. We walked through the gift shop, and Paul picked out a doll that he liked.

"Not a lot of Raystown Ray stuff in here," I observed. "I expected I'd be able to get a t-shirt or something."

"Found a patch," Michelle said, and handed me a Raystown Ray patch that cost about $3.50. I took it to the register.

"So, I'm sure you get this all the time," I said to the girl at the counter,"But tell me about Raystown Ray."

She smiled. "Ray's a mystery. We don't see him much. We have a photo over there, but not much else. He doesn't show up too much. We like keeping it a mystery. We have a display here...." She slid a frame over to me, showing a little information about Raystown Ray, and two photos of footprints.

I examined it, and clicked a photo of it. The prints looked liked fakes to me; too well-defined, no changes in depth or clarity.

"I'll take this," I said, sliding the patch over.

"I'm ready to go swimming," Paul said.

"That's our next stop."

At seven, Paul likes the water far more than I ever have. We drove down to the beach area, and he was n the water within a minute, wearing his new bathing suit. Michelle set out the lawn chairs and sat down. I changed into my cryptozoology vest.

It was a new black fishing vest----Generally, anywhere you're going to investigate a water monster, you'll see no shortage of fishing vests around. I had blue fingerless gloves and a survival bracelet, and a Loch Ness Monster pin on the left side. It was loaded up with everything I needed to look into Raystown Ray.

"I'll get your water sample, Daddy," said Paul.

I handed him a sample jar. "All yours. Go ahead."

Paul splashed into the water without hesitation, and filled it up. I watched him pour a little out and then refill it a couple of times, until it was filled to his satisfaction, and then he brought it back to me.

"You want to handle the litmus paper?" I asked.

"Yeah."

I pulled the kit out of my pocket and handed it to him. He tore off a piece, dipped it into the water, and compared it to the chart on the package. "A seven," he said.

"Seven is good. Seven means the water can support life."

"Well, obviously. Otherwise I couldn't swim in there."

'Well. I mean like fish and stuff."

"Water monsters."

"Water monsters."

He happily splashed back into the water, and I walked around Raystown Lake. I followed the path, and found that it wound back and up the hill, to a little lookout area with a concession stand.

I stopped at the edge, working my way around to the best point. I could see Paul splashing around down below, and I had a good view of a couple of miles of lake. I got out my binoculars and scanned around. For a second, I thought I saw something, but it turned out to be just a boat. 

I spent about half an hour up there, checking around for any sign of the monster. There was plenty to see, but  nothing paranormal. So I turned and headed for the concession stand.

"Can I help you?" the woman asked.

"Well, I'm going to wait for my family to get hungry," I said,"But what can you tell me about Raystown Ray?"

"He's a myth," she said immediately. "A long time ago, one of the council people came up with the story to boost tourism. It probably keeps people away, though, because they're afraid to get attacked. Ray's just a myth."

I nodded. "Thanks."

I walked back down to the beach, where Paul was still going at it. I sat down beside Michelle. "Man, these people really do not stand behind their product."

"What do you mean?"

"You know how you go down to Punxsutawney, and you can't get anyone to say anything negative about the groundhog? It's exactly the opposite here. At best, nobody's interested in Raystown Ray, and at worst, they flat-out say he's not real. I got better interviews than this looking into South Bay Bessie. Hell, I got better interviews than this looking into the Altamaha-Ha, when n old man told me I was going to get eaten by an alligator."

"So it's not real?"

"Doesn't seem so. Raystown Ray is almost certainly a publicity stunt that the locals don't seem that fond of. That would explain the fake prints, and the fact that Ray is often said to eat plants. Nobody wants to swim when they might get attacked by a water monster."

"Well, Paul's having fun."

I watched my son splashing around in the water.

"Yeah, it wasn't a wasted trip."

Two nights later, I sat in a bar with Tif. We tried to go out once in a while and have a drink together. Paul was in his dance class, so tonight had seemed a good time.

"So Raystown Ray was a bust," I said. "That one is a hoax. I'm really surprised the story gained so much traction, particularly since the locals don't seem to fond of it."

"I'm sorry about that, Dad," she said.

I shrugged. "I'm just as happy to get to the truth of it. I mean, I'd love to meet a water monster, but I'm also glad enough to debunk one. That's what it's all about, really---Not finding the paranormal, but finding answers."

"Well, summer's just beginning."
I took a drink of beer.

"True," I said. "There's always the Ogua."

Here Today, Gone Giwoggle

It was dark, getting late. I was out, but not looking for ghosts or aliens. I was just walking the dog.

I walked with Rosie down the street. As I passed on the north side, one of my neighbors called out."Lou! Hey, Lou! Come over here!"

I tugged at the leash, and we walked over to their porch. The woman who lived across from me was standing with another woman, holding a cell phone. She said,"He's a ghost hunter. Play it for him."

"You think you have a ghost?" I asked, while Rosie sat on the steps patiently.

"We have a doorbell camera," the woman said. "We live across the street. I checked the recording, and this came up."

She held up the cell phone and played it for me. I saw a view of our street, and then heard a weird, creepy voice say something I couldn't quite make out. I frowned.

"That could be a ghost, right?" the woman across the street asked.

"Well....Hard to say. Has anyone ever done the research on your house?"

The woman shook her head. "No. I don't want to know."

I could do it in about five minutes without ever leaving my office, and it's generally harmless. But I let it go. "Have you had any other issues lately?"
"Well, we found a thing....A bar, you know, the kind they use to pry things open...."

"A crowbar?"

"Yes, a crowbar. We found a crowbar in the backyard. And something messed with our back fence."

"Okay," I said,"You could have led with that. You don't have a ghost. What you probably have is an attempted burglar. I'd suggest calling the police."

I love what I do, but man. A lot of people just don't think things through.

Dinner was mustard-crusted pork chops and stuffed baked potatoes---I'd found new recipes. The conversation was, of course, local history and folklore.

"So you want to write about Loop Hill Ike," I said.

Biz nodded. "My professor wants us to do folklore, and left the rest up to us. I thought Ike would be a good one."

"Who's Loop Hill Ike?" asked Paul.

"Loop Hill Ike was Isaac Gaines," I said. "He was descended from escapees on the Underground Railroad, and lived up in Keating Township. He was said to be kind of a paranormal bounty hunter; there are a lot of stories of him dealing with ghosts and monsters. Remember when you and me looked for the Swamp Angel last summer?"
"Yeah," said Paul.

"Loop Hill Ike dealt with the Swamp Angel, too. He was also responsible for handling Clinton County's official monster, the Giwoggle. The Giwoggle was sort of a werewolf, with the hands of a bird and the feet of a horse."

"Cool," said Paul. "We had chicken nuggets in school today."

"Yeah? Did you like them?"

"Yeah. I ate a bunch."

"When are you in the library?" asked Biz. "I have to do fourteen hours of supervised research."
"Take your pick," I said. "I'm in Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday from noon until eight."
"I'll come in Thursday."

"See you then."

"You mind if I order something to eat? Biz asked. 

"Nah, go ahead," I said. "Thursday nights are always dead in here. Nobody will even notice."

"So what do we have on Loop Hill Ike?"

"I went up to the attic today and pulled all the old Keystone Folklore Quarterly magazines that had his stories in them," I said. I slid three photocopies across the table to her. "Here's the Giwoggle, the Swamp Angel, and the haunted fiddle. That one is based on a real murder."

"Oh yeah?"

"The Gaines murder. One brother shot another through the window while he was eating dinner. We can get it from the microfilm if you like."

"Possibly later. Do you know where Ike is buried?"
"Yeah, he's in a small cemetery at the Clearfield/Clinton County line. I'd like to say we can go and find it, but it's a hell of a trip. We're not making it in a Prius."
"No, that's okay."

"Interestingly, there have been sightings of what they call 'bipedal wolves' in that area. With a little accounting for unsure witnesses, these could be interpreted as Giwoggles, running around the grave of their old adversary."

Biz grinned. "That's so cool."

"There was also an incident in the Civil War," I said. "Captain Wilson Kress went to recruit Ike to fight, and Ike shot him in the leg and ran. He hid out, spending some time lumbering in Warren and McKean Counties under assumed names, until the search cooled off. Years later, he met Kress at a railroad station in Lock Haven, and they shook hands and let it go."

"Cool."

"It makes me wonder about the assumed names," I said. "I have to wonder if Warren and McKean have stories of a legendary ghost hunter up there, and it's actually Ike, and they don't even know it."
"Now," said Biz,"That would be really interesting to find out. What other documentation do you have?"

"There's a will," I said. "Loop Hill Ike seems to have left a will when he died. I can pull that from the courthouse for you, if you like."

"Let's hold off on the will for now," said Biz. "But maybe you can show me later."

Morning. I got up and had some coffee. Able to function, I walked Paul down to the bus stop. He rode his scooter down excitedly. It's crazy how kids are able to wake up without coffee like that.

I put the little guy on the bus, and then walked back to the house. The morning newspaper had arrived. I took it inside and set it on the table while I had more coffee.

I opened my laptop, and checked all my e-mail. A couple of things had come in overnight. I skimmed through them, and then saw a story about dogman sightings in Pennsylvania.

I grinned.

I subscribe to all the best newsletters.

I rode down to the courthouse annex before work, and headed up to the Register and Recorder's office. The women all looked up when I walked in.

"Hi, Lou! Been a while!"

"Yeah, I don't get down on this end of town much anymore. I should bring the little guy down sometime. Right now, I gotta find a will."

"You know where to look."

The wills are all on microfiche, and with some effort, I found the right one, and put it in the machine. Loop Hill Ike had died in 1915, leaving the bulk of his estate to his housekeeper, Mary Ann Williams. Who then seemed to have vanished without a trace----I checked all the other sources, and couldn't find anything that indicated that she'd died, gotten married, or owned property.

Another mystery.

I was wearing my Aliens made me do it shirt and working the desk when Biz walked in. She had her laptop slung over her shoulder.

"Hi, hon!" I said. 

"Just here to do some writing," she said. "The last night working on my paper."

"Got it. Let me know if you need anything," I said. "Hey, you'll like this. According to one of the paranormal newsletters I subscribe to, there have been several dogman sightings in Clearfield County, near the Clinton border. Right about where Ike is buried. Now, it's not too much of a stretch to think these might be Giwoggles."

Biz grinned. "Some witches getting busy up there."

"I can print the newsletters out for you, if you like."

"Sure. Might be able to add some color to my paper."

"When is this due?"

"Tuesday. I got time. Which is good, because I sure as hell can't focus right now. I work best under pressure."

"You kind of work exclusively under pressure."

"Where exactly is Keating Township, anyway?"

"Way the hell up on the west end of the county," I said. "Actually there are two, East and West Keating, and I don't know why the hell they did that, as there's like six people between them. You want to see on a map?"

"Sure."

I took one of the tourist maps we hand out, and laid it out on the table. "Here's Lock Haven. Here's Keating."

"Wow, that is pretty far out there, isn't it?"
"Yeah, it's listed as one of the most remote places in the state. If you drive through Renovo, and then look around and it's still not deserted enough for you, Keating is your next stop."

"Can I keep this map?"

"Sure, we get them in boxes of a hundred and hand them out to the tourists."

"I went down to the courthouse the other day and pulled Ike's will for you. I have a copy made. I know you said you didn't need it right away, but...."

"No, at this point I'm glad you did. Find anything interesting?"

"Ike left the bulk of his estate to Mary Ann Williams, his housekeeper. She was to live on the property until she died. Can't find her; she's probably buried on the property up there someplace. After her death, the property was to go to Ike's in-laws, Martin and Isaac Lanager, assuming they were good to Mary Ann. If not, it was split up among his siblings."

"Lanager. That sounds....Didn't you write about that?"

"Several years ago, I wrote a column about a Lanager. Had to go back and check my files. William Lanager, who had to be a son, died in a house fire in 1949. He's buried with Isaac, but not all of him...His arm was lost in a railroad accident, and is buried across the street."

"Weird shit."

"Whole township is full of it."

"Can I order some food in here while I work?" she asked. "I'm getting hungry."

"The idea of a severed arm makes you hungry?"
"It's been a long time since breakfast."

"I mentioned the siblings. One of those was Sarah Confer, who told the Giwoggle story in the first place. In fact, since it was her grandson who wrote it down, without Sarah, we wouldn't have the county's official monster. And she was telling these legendary stories about her brother."

"Which would mean...."

"Which would mean that there's only a couple of steps between Ike and what we know. Sarah, her grandson, and then me. Accounting for tall tales, a lot of this stuff has to be pretty accurate."

"So there were really Giwoggles?"

"At the time, someone believed that there were. And considering we're still getting sightings over a hundred years later, there's something up there."

I was at my desk when an e-mail came through. One of the local writers was interested in a Shoemaker article form 1954. I set down my coffee and walked to the file cabinet, sitting on the floor. S to Z was the lowest drawer, and I pulled out the Shoemaker file and started paging through it.

I found a green folder I didn't remember seeing before, and I opened it. Inside was a stack of typed pages, an interview with a Keating woman named Helen McGonigal. I read through them, fascinated.

I went and got my cell phone, and called Biz.

"Hey," she said. "What's up?"

"You remember when I wondered if maybe Loop Hill Ike had some adventures in other counties during his time on the run?"

"Yeah."

"By sheer coincidence, I just stumbled on an old paper that talks about ghostly adventures he had in Potter County while he was a fugitive. Written by Henry Shoemaker, too."

"Nice," said Biz.

"Up near the Triple Divide, Ike was camping when he heard something sneeze. He walked into the woods to follow it, and found a bunch of plants that seemed to be screaming."

"Sneezing plants?"

"Don't look at me; I don't make this stuff up. So Ike dug down, and found a skeleton, which was sneezing because it had a nose clogged with dirt. So he cleaned it off, wrapped it in a copy of the Clinton Democrat of all things, and reburied it. The ghost came to him later and thanked him."

"Cool."
"I'll make you a copy."

Dinner was marinated chicken and baked potatoes. Like always, Biz sat to my left.

"It's a relief to be done with school for the semester," she said. "Got all my papers in, and now I just have to sit back and wait for the grades."

"I remember how that goes," said Tif. "I always hated the end of the semester."

"Well, I'm done now," said Biz.

"So how'd you do on the Loop Hill Ike paper?" I asked. "Get that one back yet?"
"I got a ninety-five," she said.

"Good job," I said. "Proud of you."

Biz smiled.

"Thanks."

All's Well At Penn Wells

“See the green house down the street, Paul?” I asked my son as we stood in our front yard. “That has a connection to where we’re going today.”

“Really?” seven-year-old Paul asked.

“Yeah. We’re taking a trip to the Austin Dam Ruins in Potter County. That’s where a dam burst in 1911, and it flooded the community. The pieces of the dam are still up there, in a kind of park. After it happened, Lock Haven got some flood refugees looking for places to live. One family moved into that house.”

“I’ll tell Mom,” he said.

The Austin Dam Ruins are along Route 872, in Potter County just north of Austin. You see them from above before you actually reach them, looking down the hill from the road. I told Paul,”Keep your eyes open, little man. The ruins are on your side of the car.”

In a minute, we saw the ruins, standing below. There is something chilling and fascinating about your first sight of the Austin Dam Ruins, which are enormous and still standing where they were when the dam broke over a century ago. 

“Daaaam,” said Paul.

"When that dam broke, it flooded the town of Austin," I said. "A lot of the survivors came down to Renovo and Lock Haven, and moved into houses there. It caused quite a few hauntings; I've looked into some."

"Cool," said Paul.

"So Paul liked the Austin Dam Ruins," said Tif.

"He did." I was cooking dinner in the kitchen. Tif was keeping me company while Paul was out playing with his friends. "We walked around the ruins some, and took some photos. He had a good day. We're looking at Wellsboro and Cook Forest next."

'What's with all the family trips?"

"Work for the Pennsylvania Wilds," I said. "Hannah assigned me some themes this year, and I'm doing them once a month. For June's articles, the theme is family trips."

"Hannah actually contacted you?" Tif asked.

"Well, briefly," I said. "Actually I'm getting a new editor named Britt. Hannah got promoted. She sent me an e-mail informing me, and included Britt on it. I responded and welcomed Britt, and told her to let me know if she had any questions. That was a week ago, and she hasn't replied yet. I think we're gonna get along."

Tif laughed. "So what's in these other places you have planned?"

"Cook Forest had some of the oldest trees in the state and a swinging bridge. Wellsboro has shops, the PA Grand Canyon, and a haunted hotel. Britt hasn't commented on any of it."

"So what's the notebook for?" I asked Paul as we sat in the Wellsboro Diner.

"I'm taking notes," he said. "I can write about this."
"Okay, that works," I said. "Maybe you can submit stuff to the Pennsylvania Wilds." I turned to Michelle. "So, what do you want to see after lunch?"

"I noticed a lot of nice shops on the way over here," she said. "We can do some window shopping."

"Sounds good. There's also a haunted hotel."

"Because of course there would have to be a haunted hotel."

"I figure if I get enough material, I can get two columns out of this," I said. "I can write about our trip to Wellsboro, and get a bunch of photos. And then in October, when my editors want haunted stories, I can write about the hotel and pretend I did it in two trips."

"Ready to go check out the haunted hotel, little man?" I asked.

Paul nodded. "There it is, right across the street."
"Hold my hand."
We crossed the street together, and walked into the Penn Wells Hotel in Wellsboro, Tioga County. My wife followed along behind, looking at the shops. It was a big, grand hotel that dated back to 1869. Inside was a nice lobby area with a guy sitting at the desk.

"Hello," he greeted us.

"Hi," I said. "So....Is this place haunted?"

He laughed. "Well, I've never seen anything. I've heard stories, but I'm kind of a skeptic."

Behind my back, I slipped Paul my EMF detector. He knew what to do.

"There was a fire here in 1906," the desk guy continued. "Nobody died, but it did take off the top floor. People have reported hearing piano music at night, but I've never heard anything."

"How old is this place, exactly?" I asked.

"It was built in 1869," he said. "Albert Pitkin Cone opened the place. I don't know who would be haunting it; there's never been a death in here or anything."

By which he definitely meant that there had never been a dramatic murder or suicide that was publicized. There's no way a hotel that old would never have had someone die in bed of a heart attack or something.
A maid was walking through the lobby, toward the elevator. "How about you?" I asked her. "Have you ever seen any ghosts in here?"
"Nope," she said, and got on the elevator fast in case I turned out to be a lunatic.

"Daddy, I have a yellow light," said Paul.

I looked over. The EMF detector had spiked to yellow up against one of the support beams. "Good work, little man."

Paul passed out on the couch immediately after getting home---Trips wear him out. With her boy asleep, Rosie followed me into the kitchen and curled up under the table while I got on my laptop. She was waiting for me to drop some food, even though I didn't have any. Rosie is not exactly Lassie, if you get my drift.

I checked my e-mail----Still nothing from Britt. She was more absent than Hannah; I figured we were going to get along. I checked out the history of the Penn Wells Hotel. I hate doing research online, but sometimes when you need to fill in the blanks in a different county, it was helpful.

I got on Findagrave and ran the name of Albert Pitkin Cone. He was buried in the Wellsboro Cemetery and not hard to find. 

Michelle was in the other room, watching TV. I walked in, followed by the dog.

"You remember how the desk guy at the hotel said nobody had died in the hotel?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"Well, okay, there were no high-profile deaths in there that I can find. But the owner, Albert Pitkin Cone, lost a daughter in a fire before he bought the place. She was four. His wife died later at age thirty-seven. It's not too much of a stretch to figure they could have followed him, and be haunting the place right now."

"That makes sense," she said.

"That's why we get our information from the paranormal investigators, instead of the random public," I said.

"The Austin Dam article ran the other day," I said. "Britt contacted me about it, but as she said she liked it, I think I'll forgive her."

We were sitting in Doolittle Station, a neat little diner and attraction in Clearfield County. Paul and I had gotten our photo taken with Bigfoot and a dinosaur outside, and the little guy was now coloring a page with some intensity, aware they'd put it on the wall afterward. 

"We should take more of those family trips," Michelle said.

I nodded. "Remember when we were first married, and we'd just take off someplace for no reason? We oughta start doing that again."

The waitress came with the food. I asked,"Do you mind if I ask your name? I'm a freelance writer with the PA Wilds, and I'd like to mention you in my article."

She smiled. "My name is Kristen, and it'll be on the receipt, too. I think I've seen some of your articles. My boyfriend and I are really into Bigfoot."

I will never get used to that.

I walked across the road on Route 36, snapping photos of the "Jefferson County" sign. Then I went around to the other side, and got a picture of Clarion County across the border. Right across the street was Forest County, and I got a couple of pictures of that, too, making it three counties within thirty seconds.

Then I walked up and joined Michelle and Paul in Cook Forest, and we walked down the trail.

"Some of these trees are hundreds of years old," I said. "I'm always a little light on ghost stories out here, but the trees are cool. It's a great state park."

Paul was running ahead a little.

"Yay!" he said. "The swinging bridge!"